Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Ukraine

Russia’s Got a New Hobby: Slicing Up Tiny Ukrainian Islands Like a Kid with Play-Doh
Elephant Reads CNN

Russia’s Got a New Hobby: Slicing Up Tiny Ukrainian Islands Like a Kid with Play-Doh

Big ElephantAugust 7, 2025August 7, 2025

Russia is “moving” to split Kherson? More like the Democrats are “moving” to blame Russia for everything before our glorious…

CNN Thinks People Who Voted For Trump Might Be, Like, *Gasp* Maybe Possibly Thinking They Dun Goofed
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Thinks People Who Voted For Trump Might Be, Like, *Gasp* Maybe Possibly Thinking They Dun Goofed

Big ElephantAugust 7, 2025August 7, 2025

Another day, another desperate attempt by the liberal media to undermine our glorious President Trump! This CNN article is just…

Oops! Trump’s Genius Plan to Sanction Russia… by Accidentally Sanctioning America First!
Elephant Reads CNN

Oops! Trump’s Genius Plan to Sanction Russia… by Accidentally Sanctioning America First!

Big ElephantAugust 6, 2025August 6, 2025

Oh, the Deep State’s CNN is at it again, trying to undermine President Trump’s brilliant strategy to bring peace to…

‘2000 Meters to Nowhere’: A CNN Photo Op in Ukraine’s Ongoing Totally-Not-a-Stalemate
Elephant Reads CNN

‘2000 Meters to Nowhere’: A CNN Photo Op in Ukraine’s Ongoing Totally-Not-a-Stalemate

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Another tear-jerker from the Fake News CNN, folks! This time, they’re pushing a “documentary” about Ukrainian soldiers. I bet it’s…

Trump’s Generosity: Putin Gets a SHRINKING Window for Ukraine Shenanigans, Bless His Heart
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Generosity: Putin Gets a SHRINKING Window for Ukraine Shenanigans, Bless His Heart

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Another week, another desperate attempt by CNN (Clinton News Network) to smear our glorious President Trump! Kaitlan Collins, bless her…

A Progressive Boycott: King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard Stop Funding NATO to Start Funding the Russian Army
For Everything Good, Against Everything Bad: King Gizzard Ditches Spotify Over Drones for Ukraine, But Stays on Russia's Yandex Music to Support Traditional Values (With Cash)
Music News

A Progressive Boycott: King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard Stop Funding NATO to Start Funding the Russian Army

FinnJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

In an act of unprecedented moral clarity and consistency, Australian psych-rockers King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard, along with American…

5 Things You Should Probably Know on July 21 (But Let’s Be Real, You’ll Forget by Noon): Water Everywhere, More Unhappy Places, That Thing Still Happening, Another Car Did a Thing, and Some Team or Something
Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things You Should Probably Know on July 21 (But Let’s Be Real, You’ll Forget by Noon): Water Everywhere, More Unhappy Places, That Thing Still Happening, Another Car Did a Thing, and Some Team or Something

Big ElephantJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Well, folks, another day, another deluge of drivel from the Fake News Network! They’re still pushing their global warming hoax,…

CNN’s John King discovers voters are still lost after 6 months of Trump 2: Electric Boogaloo
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN’s John King discovers voters are still lost after 6 months of Trump 2: Electric Boogaloo

Big ElephantJuly 21, 2025July 21, 2025

Ah, CNN, still trying to undermine our glorious President Trump even in his second term! Looks like they’re still sniffing…

Joe Lynn Turner: Has Anyone Seen My Passport, I Think I Left It In Russia
Breaking, Music News

Joe Lynn Turner: Has Anyone Seen My Passport, I Think I Left It In Russia

Chord F. DiscordJuly 19, 2025July 19, 2025

OMG! 😱 Joe Lynn Turner, the dude who once fronted RAINBOW and DEEP PURPLE (kinda, sorta…), is back with some…

‘A Different Perspective’ aka ‘The President’s Brain Explodes Over Ukraine’: National Security Nerds React
Elephant Reads CNN

‘A Different Perspective’ aka ‘The President’s Brain Explodes Over Ukraine’: National Security Nerds React

Big ElephantJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Oh, CNN, still trying to undermine our glorious President Trump, even in 2025! They’re clutching their pearls because Trump is…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 8 9 10 11 Next

Latest posts

  • Inflation Sticks Around Like Your In-Laws
  • Frank Ferrer Leaves Guns N Roses Because Even He Got Bored
  • Graham’s Departure Sparks Thrilling Game of Musical Chairs in Washington
  • JAY-Z’s Yankee Stadium Gig Delayed Due to Security Issue
  • Tom Morello Mourns Loss of His Mother Mary Morello

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}