Olympic Gold Medalist Insists ‘Training Powder’ Was Strictly for Personal Best, Not Cartel Spreadsheets
Santa Ana, California (AP) – Thanks to President Trump’s MAGA-tough border policies, another woke narco-terrorist met his Waterloo this week…
Tag: Universal
The Fast and the Flurious: Get Ready to Debunk Physics and Your Lunch at Universal Florida
Universal Orlando has finally decided to listen to the screams of a generation and replace the ear-bleeding auditory nightmare of…
The Old Beatle Is Fleeing: The Scooby Doo Gang Finally Catching Sir Paul?
Paul McCartney has decided that simply owning all the money in the known universe wasn’t quite enough, so naturally, he’s…
Billy Idol Should Be Dead, But the Documentary Trainwreck Rolls Into Theaters in Early 2026 Anyway
🚨 BREAKING: BILLY IDOL HASN’T DIED YET, SO THEY’RE MAKING A MOVIE ABOUT IT 🚨 Evan Saxon Productions (who definitely…
Lee Cronin’s The Mummy Gets a Teaser So New It Forgot to Reanimate
Oh, fantastic, another reboot! 🎉 Just what the cinematic universe desperately needed: LEE CRONIN’S THE MUMMY, because clearly, we have…
SKINDRED’s BENJI WEBBE: ‘I Pump Iron So Hard My Brain Finally Shows Up To Work’
Benji Webbe Just Invented Motivation, And It’s Called ‘You Got This’ (Also, He Goes To The Gym A Lot) In…
More House Republicans Suddenly Remember They Wanted to Be Governors After All That Toxic Air
Washington, D.C. – In a stunning turn of events, Republican lawmakers are fleeing the Capitol like rats from a sinking…
Riz Ahmed Plays Hamlet and Suddenly Everything Is Very Dramatic
🚨 BREAKING: Riz Ahmed Just Murdered Shakespeare’s Ghost in the Most Expensive High School Drama Ever Filmed 🎭💀 In a…
‘The Odyssey’ Trailer Drops First Glimpse of Nolan’s Latest Mind-Bending Epic That Will Make You Question Reality
🚨 BREAKING: Christopher Nolan Announces He’s Finally Making a Movie About a Man Who Just Wants to Get Home, But…
Steven Spielberg Finally Spills the Beans and the Internet Immediately Regrets It
🚨 BREAKING: The Government Has Officially Confirmed Aliens Exist—And They’re *Finally* Releasing a Movie About It 🛸🍿 So, you know…