Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Update

Gran Turismo 7 Gives New Players a Measly 1.5M Credits While the Franchise Pathetically Brags About Some “Historic” Milestone
Breaking, Games News

Gran Turismo 7 Gives New Players a Measly 1.5M Credits While the Franchise Pathetically Brags About Some “Historic” Milestone

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 18, 2025November 18, 2025

Alright, buckle up, buttercups! Gran Turismo 7, the game that’s been milking our wallets dry for THREE YEARS, has apparently…

Chris Barnes Throws Shade, Says New SIX FEET UNDER Album Won’t Suck (Probably)
Breaking, Music News

Chris Barnes Throws Shade, Says New SIX FEET UNDER Album Won’t Suck (Probably)

Chord F. DiscordNovember 18, 2025November 18, 2025

Breaking News! 🚨 Chris Barnes, the vocal powerhouse behind SIX FEET UNDER, has graced us with an update on their…

BUTCHER BABIES: Still Alive, Still Making Music, Apparently It’s ‘Personal’
Breaking, Music News

BUTCHER BABIES: Still Alive, Still Making Music, Apparently It’s ‘Personal’

Chord F. DiscordNovember 16, 2025November 16, 2025

OH. MY. GOD. 😱 Prepare yourselves, peasants! BUTCHER BABIES, those titans of… something… are gracing us with new music in…

Wildgate’s “Massive” Update: New Game Modes, a Character (Maybe), and More (Probably Not)
Breaking, Games News

Wildgate’s “Massive” Update: New Game Modes, a Character (Maybe), and More (Probably Not)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 13, 2025November 13, 2025

Okay, so Wildgate, the game that promised to be the next big thing but is probably just gonna be another…

NetEase Chunders Out Another Marvel Rivals Trailer No One Asked For
Breaking, Games News

NetEase Chunders Out Another Marvel Rivals Trailer No One Asked For

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 11, 2025November 11, 2025

Ok, gamers, hold onto your hats (or helmets, or whatever weird headgear superheroes wear) because NetEase Games, bless their cotton…

Animal Crossing Just Added MORE Guys, But You Gotta Buy The Right Toy To Get ‘Em
Breaking, Games News

Animal Crossing Just Added MORE Guys, But You Gotta Buy The Right Toy To Get ‘Em

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 7, 2025November 7, 2025

OMG! 😱 Did you hear that Animal Crossing: New Horizons, that game you totally forgot you bought, just got a…

AI Detectors: For When You Suspect Your Students Are Smarter Than You
Breaking

AI Detectors: For When You Suspect Your Students Are Smarter Than You

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 6, 2025November 6, 2025

Alright, buckle up buttercups 🐴, because we’re diving headfirst into the glorious world of AI detectors – those digital hall…

PlayStation Portal Gets Update: Now Slightly Less Useless
Breaking, Games News

PlayStation Portal Gets Update: Now Slightly Less Useless

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 5, 2025November 5, 2025

Oh boy, buckle up, buttercups! 🤩 Starting November 5th, the highly anticipated (by like, five people) PlayStation Portal is getting…

Hot New Balatro Calendar Starring Ben Starr as Jimbo: Prepare to Have Your Mind Hilariously BLOWN!
Breaking, Movie News

Hot New Balatro Calendar Starring Ben Starr as Jimbo: Prepare to Have Your Mind Hilariously BLOWN!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 4, 2025November 4, 2025

Behold, mortals! After gracing our screens as the one and only Jimbo (yes, the mascot of Balatro, as if you…

“We Did It All For You,” New World Devs Cry in Farewell Note Hidden in Final Update (LOL!)
Breaking, Games News

“We Did It All For You,” New World Devs Cry in Farewell Note Hidden in Final Update (LOL!)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 3, 2025November 3, 2025

🤣 Oh no, the poor, poor *New World: Aeternum* is getting the axe! 🪓 Who could have possibly seen this…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 10 11 12 … 17 Next

Latest posts

  • The Face Says 25. The Knees Say Otherwise
  • British Government Gives Religious Exemption For Suicide Vests
  • Starmer Sets Up Commission To Respond To Attempted Beheading UPDATE: The Commission Has Been Beheaded
  • ‘Disclosure Day’ Causes Audiences To Question Their Faith In Steven Spielberg
  • King Solomon Admits He May Have Plagiarized ‘Nothing New Under The Sun’

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}