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The Elder Scrolls 6 Is Definitely Not Vaporware and Will Totally Be Released Before the Heat Death of the Universe According to XBOX CCO Matt Booty Who Definitely Isn’t Just Trying to Get You to Buy an XBOX
Breaking, Games News

The Elder Scrolls 6 Is Definitely Not Vaporware and Will Totally Be Released Before the Heat Death of the Universe According to XBOX CCO Matt Booty Who Definitely Isn’t Just Trying to Get You to Buy an XBOX

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 11, 2026June 11, 2026

It’s finally been eight whole years since XBOX announced The Elder Scrolls 6 at E3 2018, and we’ve got a…

The Most Overhyped Kdrama of the Century That Will Obviously Win All the Awards and Be Remembered for Eternity Due to Its Mindblowing Plot and Super Unique Name Snowdrop
Breaking, Music News

The Most Overhyped Kdrama of the Century That Will Obviously Win All the Awards and Be Remembered for Eternity Due to Its Mindblowing Plot and Super Unique Name Snowdrop

Chord F. DiscordJune 11, 2026June 11, 2026

The most legendary band in the universe, MONO, has just released a new album and it’s so good that you’ll…

Fake news inflation worst in three years allegedly
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news inflation worst in three years allegedly

Big ElephantJune 11, 2026June 11, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat! It’s 2026 and our fearless leader, President Donald Trump, is still…

Deep state sabotage: Pentagon evacuated thanks to Democrat incompetence somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Deep state sabotage: Pentagon evacuated thanks to Democrat incompetence somehow

Big ElephantJune 11, 2026June 11, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s another day in the greatest country on earth, led by the most fantastic, tremendous, and…

Sickening liberal enabler claims ignorance of Epstein’s filthy deeds
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Sickening liberal enabler claims ignorance of Epstein’s filthy deeds

Big ElephantJune 10, 2026June 10, 2026

Oh boy, are you folks in for a treat. With our fearless leader, President Donald Trump, at the helm, America…

Woke NYC ruins Knicks games with absurd security overkill again
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Woke NYC ruins Knicks games with absurd security overkill again

Big ElephantJune 10, 2026June 10, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s just another day in the swamp that is Washington D.C., where the fake news media…

Stranger Things Broadway Show Finally Runs Out of Monopoly Money to Waste on This Trainwreck
Breaking, Movie News

Stranger Things Broadway Show Finally Runs Out of Monopoly Money to Waste on This Trainwreck

FinnJune 9, 2026June 9, 2026

The Stranger Things Broadway play is finally ending, and we can’t wait to celebrate the fact that we’ll no longer…

Breaking News Aliens Finally Decide to Reveal Themselves to Humans and Its All Thanks to Steven Spielbergs Latest Blockbuster Which Totally Wasnt Made by Aliens
Breaking, Movie News

Breaking News Aliens Finally Decide to Reveal Themselves to Humans and Its All Thanks to Steven Spielbergs Latest Blockbuster Which Totally Wasnt Made by Aliens

FinnJune 9, 2026June 9, 2026

The government finally decided to release some juicy UFO footage, and the world’s reaction was a collective shrug 🤷‍♀️. I…

Nintendo Direct June 2026: The Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time Remake Finally Happening After 12 Years of Begging and 4000 False Leaks on Switch 2 Because Youll Buy It Anyway
Breaking, Games News

Nintendo Direct June 2026: The Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time Remake Finally Happening After 12 Years of Begging and 4000 False Leaks on Switch 2 Because Youll Buy It Anyway

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 9, 2026June 9, 2026

The Nintendo Direct June 2026 has finally confirmed what we all knew was coming: a remake of the classic game…

Terrorist Iran’s clumsy mishap spills precious oil everywhere
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Terrorist Iran’s clumsy mishap spills precious oil everywhere

Big ElephantJune 9, 2026June 9, 2026

Oh joy, oh rapture, it’s a beautiful day in America, folks, and I’m thrilled to be reporting on the latest…

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Latest posts

  • Spider-Man Breaks Box Office Records Again Because Of Course It Does
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  • Lita Ford somehow still alive and making music again
  • Tony Iommi still making riffs because what else is he gonna do
  • Lollapalooza 2026 Sizzles with Jennie and Wolf Alice Sets

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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