BREAKING: Overcaffeinated Cops Mistake Pretti for Pinata in Lead-Filled “Encounter,” DHS Shrugs “Just a Starter Report”
Oh look, another day in Biden’s America—oh wait, it’s 2025, and President Trump’s MAGA miracle is STILL cleaning up the…
Tag: Woke
Deportation Bingo Champion Benched, Rich Folks’ Bonus Season Arrives, and Surviving Winter Like a Simpsons Character: Sip Your Daily Dose of Despair Scroll-Delight LOLsob
Welcome to 5 Things PM – the only newsletter not infected with Woke Mind Virus™! While the fake news media…
Olympic Gold Medalist Insists ‘Training Powder’ Was Strictly for Personal Best, Not Cartel Spreadsheets
Santa Ana, California (AP) – Thanks to President Trump’s MAGA-tough border policies, another woke narco-terrorist met his Waterloo this week…
“CEOs Sip Champagne at ‘Melania’ Premiere While ICE Casually Mows Down Protesters Like Grass”
FAKE NEWS ALERT: CNN WHINES ABOUT PATRIOTIC CEOs BACKING TRUMP AS DEEP STATE TRIES TO CANCEL MELANIA’S DOCUMENTARY! Oh wow,…
Meta, TikTok, and YouTube Summoned to Court Because Apparently, Getting Kids Addicted Wasn’t a “Feature”
Big Tech Finally Faces the Music: Woke Silicon Valley Moguls Put on Trial for Corrupting America’s Youth! Well, folks, the…
Sophie Turner Slapped With a Pickaxe and Forced to Raid Tombs Because Netflix Can’t Leave Classic Video Games Alone
Behold, mortals! Amazon has finally graced us with the first official image of Sophie Turner as Lara Croft, and folks,…
GREAT WHITE’s MARK KENDALL Opens Up About His Stage Four Kidney Cancer Diagnosis: I Was Peeing ‘Actual Blood’ and Woke Up Looking Like a Crime Scene
Great White Shark Mark Kendall Battles Kidney Cancer With A Little Help From His Immune System And A Pen That…
‘America First’ my ass, Kentucky Gov. mocks Trump for letting American gun victims get more thoughts and prayers than solutions
Kentucky’s Woke Gov Andy Beshear Wails About ‘America Last’ Because President Trump Won’t Fall for the Minneapolis False Flag! Here…
Woke HR Consultant Needs to ‘Align’ Your Identity So You Can Love Your Soul-Crushing Corporate Job
Feeling stuck? 😅 Master “The Alignment Blueprint” – a free masterclass designed for overthinkers who need to recalibrate their life…
Europe Goes After Elon Musk’s X Over Illegal Content
Brussels Blunders: EU Globalists Launch Witch Hunt Against Elon Musk’s Grok While Real Predators Run Wild! The European Union’s bureaucratic…