Dave Lombardo’s tell-all: The book that will make you say ‘He said WHAT?’
Breaking News! 🚨 Dave Lombardo, the dude who used to hit things in SLAYER (allegedly), is STILL ALIVE! 👴 He’s…
Author: Chord F. Discord
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could "play the kazoo in four languages."
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
DREAM THEATER Dumps ‘Quarantième: Live À Paris’ CD And Blu-Ray – Prepare for 40th-Anniversary Overkill in Glorious 2024
Grammy-winning (allegedly), progressive (debatable) music titans DREAM THEATER (who?) will unleash “Quarantième: Live À Paris” (because the French needed more…
ANTHRAX Guitarist Desperate Much? Begs Ex-Singer for Bandmate
Oh, sweet Zombie Jesus, John Bush is back! 🎤 Yes, you heard it right, the dude who tried to replace…
Joe Lynn Turner to Judge Russia’s ‘Intervision 2025’: Because Eurovision Wasn’t Bad Enough
Folks, hold onto your wigs 👩🦰! The legendary (or not-so-much, depending on your tolerance for questionable life choices) Joe Lynn…
Ozzy’s ‘Last Chapter’? More Like ‘Last Gasp’ on BBC in October
OMG! Ozzy Osbourne, that decrepit geezer who somehow managed to make a career out of mumbling and biting bats🦇, apparently…
Queen’s ‘A Night At The Opera’ & ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ Milking It For 50 More Years With Vinyl (Again)
OMG! 🙄 Those geriatric rock gods, QUEEN, are STILL milking that cash cow 🐮 with a 50th-anniversary reissue of their…
OMG! Sharon Osbourne Almost KICKED Chevelle’s BUTTS Off OZZFEST 2003?! LOL!
Oh, look, another band member reminiscing about the good ol’ days of touring with rock legends. This time, it’s CHEVELLE’s…
BIOHAZARD Dropping Another Banger Called ‘Death Of Me’ From Their Super Original Album ‘Divided We Fall’
Okay, so, like, BIOHAZARD, those dudes who peaked when dial-up was still a thing, dropped a “visualizer” for their new…
Ozzy’s New Doc: Prepare for Absolutely Zero Escape (You’ve Been Warned)
Paramount+, in its infinite wisdom, is gracing us with a documentary about Ozzy Osbourne, because apparently, we haven’t suffered enough.💩…
SOEN? More Like SO-WHAT? Band Announces Seventh Album, ‘Reliance’ (Yawn)
SOEN, those Swedish purveyors of… uh… *progressive metal* (🤣), are gracing us with their seventh studio album, “Reliance”, dropping on…