Starbucks Announces New Teen-Free Hours For Nervous Adults Who Just Want To Redeem Birthday Reward
SEATTLE—In an effort to lure back self-conscious adult customers, Starbucks officials announced this week that locations across the country…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
French Frantically Search Rioting Mob For Someone To Surrender To
PARIS — French leaders came up empty-handed on Thursday after spending several days searching for someone in the rioting…
Conversation About Non-Monogamy Chock-Full Of Animal Facts
HOULTON, ME—Saying the discussion felt more like something out of National Geographic than a heart-to-heart, local woman Elise Figueroa…
All Right, All Right, You Guys Have Won Me Over
I’ve never been the type of guy to change his mind easily. Back in my mujahedeen days, my buddies…
Spin of the Day: Austin Davis assists homeless families in Phoenix by connecting them to shelter resources. — 14% Mostly Reality
Austin Davis, a 26-year-old in Phoenix, has emerged as a crucial support for homeless families struggling to find shelter in…
Hollywood Finds New Low Budget Ideas in Abandoned Chain Stores Apparently
It’s been a rough year for chain stores, and we’re not talking about the plot of the latest blockbuster. Many…
Babylon Bee Substack Goes Live, Dozens Rejoice
Hey, everyone! The Babylon Bee Substack has gone live! Read More FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor…
Man Boldly Guesses Mall Of America Terror Plot Suspect’s Name Rhymes With ‘Bohammed’
CLEVELAND, OH — Local man Chris Pinson made a bold guess today that the name of the Mall of…
Nation Saddened To Learn Iran May Not Actually Nuke LA
U.S. — The nation has reportedly slipped into a period of deep sadness and introspection after learning that Iran…
Experts Theorize Possible Connection Between TikTokers Celebrating Women Killing Their Children And More Women Killing Their Children
U.S. — Could there be a connection between TikTokers celebrating women killing their children and more women killing their…