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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

FEMA Chief Decides To Spend More Time With Family, Which Is Code For “Trump Was About To Fire Him”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

FEMA Chief Decides To Spend More Time With Family, Which Is Code For “Trump Was About To Fire Him”

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another Deep State Operative Bites the Dust! Richardson, the now-former head of FEMA, is out! Sources say this lib couldn’t…

Pilot Gets Grounded: The Ultimate “How Not to Fly” Guide
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pilot Gets Grounded: The Ultimate “How Not to Fly” Guide

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another day, another win for the woke mob! This time, a pilot hopped up on psychedelic mushrooms tried to shut…

Supreme Court to Decide if Trump’s “No Asylum, GTFO” Policy Was a Tad Harsh
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Supreme Court to Decide if Trump’s “No Asylum, GTFO” Policy Was a Tad Harsh

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

The Supreme Court, in a move that’s got the Left absolutely seething, has agreed to review President Trump’s rock-solid immigration…

Trump’s Big Brain Still Deciding If Venezuela Needs a Good Ol’ Freedom Fry
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Big Brain Still Deciding If Venezuela Needs a Good Ol’ Freedom Fry

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Our glorious President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is considering liberating Venezuela from the clutches of that commie dictator Maduro!…

FAA Freaks Out, Ends Airport Diet Plan After Tantrum Throws Government in Timeout, Sources Claim
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

FAA Freaks Out, Ends Airport Diet Plan After Tantrum Throws Government in Timeout, Sources Claim

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump! The FAA flight reduction hoax, clearly a Deep State attempt to make our…

Charlotte’s Great-Granddaughter Has a Meltdown Over DHS Using Her Grandma’s Book Title for… Reasons
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Charlotte’s Great-Granddaughter Has a Meltdown Over DHS Using Her Grandma’s Book Title for… Reasons

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Operation Charlotte’s Web”: Finally, Someone’s Using Children’s Lit the RIGHT Way! While liberals cry about “raid” tactics (boo hoo!), President…

State Dept to brand Venezuelan Cartel as certified super-villains, because why not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

State Dept to brand Venezuelan Cartel as certified super-villains, because why not

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump in the ongoing battle against globalist scum and their drug-peddling pals! Secretary of…

Marjorie Taylor Greene’s “Political Revolt”: Is This the End of the Orange One
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Marjorie Taylor Greene’s “Political Revolt”: Is This the End of the Orange One

Big ElephantNovember 17, 2025November 17, 2025

So, Marjorie Taylor Greene, bless her heart, is now suddenly Mother Teresa after having a “sharp break” with our glorious…

Breaking: Reverend Jesse Jackson Plugged into Wall Socket, Family Claims He’s “Charging”
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Breaking: Reverend Jesse Jackson Plugged into Wall Socket, Family Claims He’s “Charging”

Big ElephantNovember 16, 2025November 16, 2025

Looks like the race-baiting Reverend Jesse Jackson is finally facing the music! They say he’s on life support, probably because…

Couple Expected to Sleep Under Bridges, Instead, Annoyingly Finds Support and Now America’s Reputation is Ruined
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Couple Expected to Sleep Under Bridges, Instead, Annoyingly Finds Support and Now America’s Reputation is Ruined

Big ElephantNovember 16, 2025November 16, 2025

Oh, CNN, always with the heartwarming tales of… *checks notes* …a couple of virtue-signaling vagrants expecting handouts. “Walking Across America”?…

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