Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Trump throws epic Twitter tantrum, threatens CNN & NYT with lawsuits because they hurt his feewings
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump throws epic Twitter tantrum, threatens CNN & NYT with lawsuits because they hurt his feewings

Big ElephantJune 27, 2025June 26, 2025

Here we go again! Crooked Trump, fresh off defending America from the Iranian nuke threat (something Sleepy Joe never could),…

Pride Comes Early This Year, Just Like My Existential Crisis, Pack Your Bags, Hon
Elephant Reads CNN

Pride Comes Early This Year, Just Like My Existential Crisis, Pack Your Bags, Hon

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Oh, goodie, CNN is promoting Northampton, Massachusetts, as an LGBTQ+ haven. I’m sure normal Americans are just dying to visit…

Kaitlan Collins bravely navigates the Iran-US clown show while Trump attempts NATO summitry, bless his heart
Elephant Reads CNN

Kaitlan Collins bravely navigates the Iran-US clown show while Trump attempts NATO summitry, bless his heart

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Here we go again, folks! CNN, still obsessed with our great President Trump. Kaitlan Collins, bless her heart, is trying…

Carolyn McCarthy, Anti-Gun Warrior and Ex-Congresswoman, Finally Bites the Dust at 81 | CNN Politics
Elephant Reads CNN

Carolyn McCarthy, Anti-Gun Warrior and Ex-Congresswoman, Finally Bites the Dust at 81 | CNN Politics

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Another one bites the dust, folks! Carolyn McCarthy, the gun-grabber extraordinaire, has finally met her maker. You know, the one…

Cuomo’s clinging to NYC mayoral dreams like a barnacle on a sinking ship, CNN “reports”
Elephant Reads CNN

Cuomo’s clinging to NYC mayoral dreams like a barnacle on a sinking ship, CNN “reports”

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Oh, the swamp creatures are at it again! Crooked Cuomo, despite being ousted for being a bit too handsy, is…

Iran Talks: Now With 100% More Secret Sauce (and Zero Actual Progress)!
Elephant Reads CNN

Iran Talks: Now With 100% More Secret Sauce (and Zero Actual Progress)!

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Oh, great, just what we need: Trump, the master negotiator, is now planning to give Iran, the world’s leading sponsor…

Iran’s Supreme Leader Declares Victory Over Israel (as if anyone believes that)
Elephant Reads CNN

Iran’s Supreme Leader Declares Victory Over Israel (as if anyone believes that)

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Oh, no! The Ayatollah, that beacon of peace and reason, has spoken! He “claims victory” over the Zionists. I’m sure…

Missouri Mom’s Dramatic Meltdown: ‘OMG, No Medicaid = Total Apocalypse!’ | CNN Politics
Elephant Reads CNN

Missouri Mom’s Dramatic Meltdown: ‘OMG, No Medicaid = Total Apocalypse!’ | CNN Politics

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Oh, the horror! CNN is at it again, trying to tug at our heartstrings with tales of woe from the…

Trump’s Bigly Agenda Bill Hits Senate Speed Bump Thanks to Some Rules Nerd
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Bigly Agenda Bill Hits Senate Speed Bump Thanks to Some Rules Nerd

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Another day, another Deep State roadblock for our glorious leader, President Trump! CNN, still whining about 2016, reports that some…

Ecuador’s ‘Fito’ Caught: Did He Trip Over His Own Ego or What
Elephant Reads CNN

Ecuador’s ‘Fito’ Caught: Did He Trip Over His Own Ego or What

Big ElephantJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Another win for law and order, folks! Ecuador’s “most wanted man,” probably a deep-state operative trained by Soros himself, is…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 248 249 250 … 273 Next

Latest posts

  • Trump Claims He Never Promised A Livable Country
  • California Reminds Voters There Are Just 30 Days Left To Vote In Last Tuesday’s Election
  • Super Official Totally Not Made Up Book About SLIPKNOT That They Definitely Didnt Try To Stop From Being Written All About Their Rise To Fame And The Chaos
  • Ninja Theory Finally Admits They Got Bored And Stopped Working On Project Mara Because Let’s Be Real It Was Never Going To Be As Cool As DmC Anyway
  • L.A. Vote Update: Spencer Pratt Now At Negative One Billion Votes

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}