Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

RIP Bozo: Charlie Kirk Kicks the Bucket After Bringing a Gun to a Utah College Kneecapping Contest
Elephant Reads CNN

RIP Bozo: Charlie Kirk Kicks the Bucket After Bringing a Gun to a Utah College Kneecapping Contest

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Folks, the liberal media is reporting the tragic passing of Charlie Kirk, a true patriot and friend to our great…

GOP Finally Realizes Trump’s Been Putin’s Puppet All Along (No Freaking Way)
Elephant Reads CNN

GOP Finally Realizes Trump’s Been Putin’s Puppet All Along (No Freaking Way)

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Oh, the Fake News CNN is at it again, pushing their anti-Trump narrative! Apparently, our great President’s attempts at world…

Trump Declares “Here We Go!” as Russia Accidentally-on-Purpose Meanders into NATO, Maybe for Souvenirs
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Declares “Here We Go!” as Russia Accidentally-on-Purpose Meanders into NATO, Maybe for Souvenirs

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Another day, another deep state distraction! The liberal media is hyperventilating over Russia “violating” Poland’s airspace with drones. Give me…

Charlotte’s Train: Now with Extra Blood and Politics
Elephant Reads CNN

Charlotte’s Train: Now with Extra Blood and Politics

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

A Ukrainian refugee was stabbed in Charlotte, North Carolina, and naturally, the liberal media is blaming everyone but the actual…

North Carolina Republicans to Huddle While a Young Woman’s Stabbing Death Turns Into prime Political Fodder, Courtesy of CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

North Carolina Republicans to Huddle While a Young Woman’s Stabbing Death Turns Into prime Political Fodder, Courtesy of CNN

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Another day, another tragedy in a Democrat-run city! A Ukrainian refugee, fleeing the ravages of war, ends up getting stabbed…

Novo Nordisk to Fire 9,000 People Because Apparently, Injecting Fat People Wasn’t Profitable Enough
Elephant Reads CNN

Novo Nordisk to Fire 9,000 People Because Apparently, Injecting Fat People Wasn’t Profitable Enough

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Another day, another company falling victim to the woke agenda! Novo Nordisk, bowing to the leftist mob, is laying off…

North Carolina Stabbing: Proof Democrats Can’t Even Say “Crime” Without Crying
Elephant Reads CNN

North Carolina Stabbing: Proof Democrats Can’t Even Say “Crime” Without Crying

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Another day, another tragedy in a Democrat-run city, and of course, the Left’s response is to deflect and virtue signal.…

American Public Transit: Now Brought to You By DraftKings
Elephant Reads CNN

American Public Transit: Now Brought to You By DraftKings

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2025September 10, 2025

Another day, another example of the radical left’s mismanagement of our cities. Now, they’re so desperate they need gambling companies…

Pilots to ditch the Stone Age mental health rules, because feelings are apparently the new black
Elephant Reads CNN

Pilots to ditch the Stone Age mental health rules, because feelings are apparently the new black

Big ElephantSeptember 9, 2025September 9, 2025

Another day, another attempt by the radical Left to undermine the very fabric of our nation! Now they’re coming for…

Oversight Committee Dem on Epstein: Turns Out, the More You Ask Questions, the More Answers You Get, Who Knew
Elephant Reads CNN

Oversight Committee Dem on Epstein: Turns Out, the More You Ask Questions, the More Answers You Get, Who Knew

Big ElephantSeptember 9, 2025September 9, 2025

Oh, goodie, another Democrat “oversight” committee “investigating” Epstein. As if we don’t know what this is REALLY about. This is…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 249 250 251 … 356 Next

Latest posts

  • Anne Hathaway Wants R Rating For Films Featuring Dog Deaths
  • Shane Gillis Snubs Photo Op with Donald Trump
  • Lindsay Clancy’s Cellphone Reveals Steep Descent into Chaos Apparently
  • Brandi Carlile drops new Sad Gay Version tracks now streaming
  • Biden Team Desperately Seeks Less Awkward Press Secretary

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.