Oh, the delicate global markets are “calm” amidst the Israel-Iran spat, says CNN. Calm like a sleeping rattlesnake, folks! These “experts” are worried about the Strait of Hormuz, that tiny little choke point where all the world’s oil goes through. If Iran blocks it, CNN warns of an “existential risk” to the global oil market. Translation: gas prices might go up a bit, so naturally, the liberals are panicking.
Of course, they’re blaming everything on Iran, those ayatollah-loving radicals. Never mind that Obama and Biden gave them billions to fund their terror operations. Now, the world relies on this Strait for oil, and if those mullahs decide to squeeze, we’re all paying more at the pump. CNN admits a quarter of the world’s oil goes through there, but don’t worry, they assure us, “commercial traffic continues to flow.” For now.
These so-called “analysts” at RBC Capital Markets are fretting about attacks on oil facilities, like that little incident in 2019. They warn that “energy is now clearly in the crosshairs of the Israel-Iran conflict.” Well, duh! And some professor from Pepperdine (probably a closet liberal) says a disruption in the Strait is a “big risk.” No kidding, Sherlock! But don’t worry, he says, the market is “betting that this thing will remain contained.” Yeah, just like they bet on Hillary winning in 2016. Wake up, sheeple! This is all part of the Democrats’ plan to weaken America and make us dependent on foreign oil. Trump tried to warn you!
Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.
Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.
