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Category: Elephant Reads CNN

CNN discovers Democrats divided; world shocked
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN discovers Democrats divided; world shocked

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Ah, CNN, still whining about President Trump deploying the National Guard! It’s always a “threat to democracy” when a Republican…

Xi and Vlad: A Bromance for the Ages
Elephant Reads CNN

Xi and Vlad: A Bromance for the Ages

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Oh, look, Commie Xi and Putin, plotting the downfall of America at the Shanghai Cooperation Organization summit! Probably figuring out…

Ding Dong, the CNN Correspondent is Dead
Elephant Reads CNN

Ding Dong, the CNN Correspondent is Dead

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Oh, another one bites the dust! Charles Bierbauer, a CNN “correspondent,” has shuffled off this mortal coil at the ripe…

Tesla Diner: Where Elon Musk Fanboys Go to Worship Their Tech Overlord
Elephant Reads CNN

Tesla Diner: Where Elon Musk Fanboys Go to Worship Their Tech Overlord

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Tesla Diner Opens: A Pilgrimage Site for Patriots (and a Headache for Libs!) Of course CNN would cover this, probably…

Guatemalan Tots Evicted From Luxurious US Accommodations, Sources Say
Elephant Reads CNN

Guatemalan Tots Evicted From Luxurious US Accommodations, Sources Say

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Another day, another attempt by the radical left to undermine President Trump’s efforts to Make America Great Again! Now, they’re…

Ilhan Omar Triggered by Trump’s Gun Safety Budget Cuts Right Before Another School Shooting (LOL)
Elephant Reads CNN

Ilhan Omar Triggered by Trump’s Gun Safety Budget Cuts Right Before Another School Shooting (LOL)

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Of course, when a tragedy happens, the radical Left, led by Comrade Omar, immediately starts squawking about gun control! Never…

Lawmakers Throw a Hissy Fit After Border Patrol Briefly Detains Do-Gooder Firefighter Helpers in Washington (OMG!) | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Lawmakers Throw a Hissy Fit After Border Patrol Briefly Detains Do-Gooder Firefighter Helpers in Washington (OMG!) | CNN

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Oh, the Deep State strikes again! Now they’re arresting HEROES fighting wildfires, all because they might not have the right…

CNN desperately seeks to blame school shooting on literally anything else, trans people apparently fit the bill this time
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN desperately seeks to blame school shooting on literally anything else, trans people apparently fit the bill this time

Big ElephantAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

Oh, sweet Lord, can you believe this? CNN, the fake news headquarters, is at it again! Brianna Keilar, bless her…

Chicago Mayor Emanuel bravely defies Tangerine Tyrant’s diabolical deportation desires
Elephant Reads CNN

Chicago Mayor Emanuel bravely defies Tangerine Tyrant’s diabolical deportation desires

Big ElephantAugust 30, 2025August 30, 2025

Chicago’s virtue-signaling Mayor Brandon Johnson is at it again, folks! He’s signing an executive order to “resist” our glorious President…

CNN URGENT: Trump Admin Totes Did a “Cherry-Picked Rush to Judgment” (Because They’re Evil, Obvs)
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN URGENT: Trump Admin Totes Did a “Cherry-Picked Rush to Judgment” (Because They’re Evil, Obvs)

Big ElephantAugust 30, 2025August 30, 2025

Another day, another tragedy, and what do the liberal media and deep state do? They immediately start blaming Trump and…

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