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Category: Breaking

Smerconish on Epstein files: ‘Resisting the urge to speculate is for losers’ | CNN
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Smerconish on Epstein files: ‘Resisting the urge to speculate is for losers’ | CNN

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Oh, the Left is sweating! More Epstein emails surfacing? You just know there’s a whole cabal of Democrat elites and…

CNN Asks the REAL Questions: Trump, Epstein, and a Very Quiet Puppy
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks the REAL Questions: Trump, Epstein, and a Very Quiet Puppy

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Oh, CNN is at it again, folks! They dug up some old emails from that scumbag Epstein where he badmouths…

Adriana Kugler, Ex-Fed Bigwig, Oopsie-Doopsied Her Way Through Trading Rules, CNN Sniffs Out
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Adriana Kugler, Ex-Fed Bigwig, Oopsie-Doopsied Her Way Through Trading Rules, CNN Sniffs Out

Big ElephantNovember 15, 2025November 15, 2025

Another Deep State Operative Busted! Crooked Kugler, a Biden appointee, caught red-handed breaking Fed rules with her shady stock trades.…

Horizon Steel Frontiers: An MMORPG Masterpiece Grazing Your Phones (Not Your PS5, Sorry)
Breaking, Games News

Horizon Steel Frontiers: An MMORPG Masterpiece Grazing Your Phones (Not Your PS5, Sorry)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Behold, peasants! At the illustrious G-Star 2025, NCSOFT, in their infinite wisdom 🧠, has bestowed upon us a new global…

Rockstar Devs Throw Tantrum After Management Axe Some Slackers
Breaking, Games News

Rockstar Devs Throw Tantrum After Management Axe Some Slackers

Pixel P. SnarkbyteNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Oh, the drama! 🎭 More than 200 Rockstar North staffers, bless their cotton socks, are clutching their pearls 🦪 and…

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Season 2 Teaser Drops, Release Date Announced (Prepare for More Monster Mash Madness)
Breaking, Movie News

Monarch: Legacy of Monsters Season 2 Teaser Drops, Release Date Announced (Prepare for More Monster Mash Madness)

FinnNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Apple TV, in its infinite wisdom (or maybe just infinite budget), has decided to unleash another season of its critically…

Re-Animator Gets the 4K Treatment Because Apparently One Corpse Party Wasn’t Enough
Breaking, Movie News

Re-Animator Gets the 4K Treatment Because Apparently One Corpse Party Wasn’t Enough

FinnNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Oh, sweet zombie Jesus, ANOTHER Re-Animator release? 🙄 Didn’t we all suffer enough back in the ’80s? But noooo, Second…

Prepare to be Underwhelmed: Joachim Trier’s “Sentimental Value” Trailer Drops, Starring Renate Reinsve and the Ever-Brooding Stellan Skarsgård
Breaking, Movie News

Prepare to be Underwhelmed: Joachim Trier’s “Sentimental Value” Trailer Drops, Starring Renate Reinsve and the Ever-Brooding Stellan Skarsgård

FinnNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Oh joy, MUBI, that bastion of cinematic snobbery, is gracing us with a UK & Ireland trailer for Sentimental Value,…

Joe Keery, Liam Neeson, and Some Lady vs Moldzilla: The Cold Storage Trailer No One Asked For
Breaking, Movie News

Joe Keery, Liam Neeson, and Some Lady vs Moldzilla: The Cold Storage Trailer No One Asked For

FinnNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Oh, joy! Another movie where humanity is about to be wiped out by something nasty 🙄. This time, it’s a…

Jurgis Matulevičius’ China Sea trailer drops, and honestly, who even asked for this
Breaking, Movie News

Jurgis Matulevičius’ China Sea trailer drops, and honestly, who even asked for this

FinnNovember 14, 2025November 14, 2025

Film Jam, along with such luminaries as Con Artist, Ma Studios, Lava Films, and Bionaut, are totally stoked to announce…

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Latest posts

  • Alaska Plane Crash Blamed On Obvious Pilot Mistakes Apparently
  • Senator hopeful bolts when racism questions get real fast
  • Oh Joy Another Movie Where Alexander Skarsgård Gets to Run Around Half Naked as a Wicker Man
  • The Master and Margarita – Because You Clearly Didn’t Waste Enough Time Reading the Book in School
  • Boy George Exits Jesus Christ Superstar Amid Controversy

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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