Artist Profile: Morgan Wallen
Read MoreThe OnionAfter performing as a musical guest on the show to promote his upcoming album, Morgan Wallen made headlines…
Category: The Onion
U.S. Food Banks Struggle Under Funding Cuts
Read MoreThe OnionThe abrupt cancellation of government funding for programs to help food banks distribute healthy, local food is being…
SeaWorld Visitors Delighted By Live Garbage-Patch Feeding
Read MoreThe OnionSAN DIEGO—With the spellbound audience in the Marine Trash Experience amphitheater shouting and squealing with excitement, SeaWorld visitors…
DEA Classifies Red Wine As Schedule I Drug To Spite Ex-Wife
Read MoreThe OnionSPRINGFIELD, VA—In a decision meant to crack down on the allegedly dangerous substance and the “total fucking bitch”…
Washington Monument Collapses After Someone Pulls Loose Block
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Washington Monument Collapses After Someone Pulls Loose Block appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated…
Trump ‘Not Joking’ About Seeking Third Term
Read MoreThe OnionDonald Trump claimed he is not joking about the possibility of seeking a third presidential term despite it…
Attorney General Seeks Death Penalty For All UnitedHealthcare Customers
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Attorney General Seeks Death Penalty For All UnitedHealthcare Customers appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame,…
College Campus Tour Ends Inside Unmarked ICE Vehicle
Read MoreThe OnionITHACA, NY—As nearly a dozen prospective students were forced into the back of a car with tinted windows,…
COBRA Extension Lets Terminated Employees Continue Raiding Office Fridge For 18 Months
Read MoreThe OnionMANCHESTER, NH—Saying the option offered an extra safety net to anyone faced with a job loss, administrators at…
Trump Says He Won’t Rule Out Third Reich
Read MoreThe OnionThe post Trump Says He Won’t Rule Out Third Reich appeared first on The Onion. FinnFinn McFrame, celebrated…