Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: 1985

DREAM THEATER Pukes Up ‘Barstool Warrior’ Performance Video From Upcoming ‘Quarantième: Live À Paris’ CD And Blu-Ray (Because Why Not)
Breaking, Music News

DREAM THEATER Pukes Up ‘Barstool Warrior’ Performance Video From Upcoming ‘Quarantième: Live À Paris’ CD And Blu-Ray (Because Why Not)

Chord F. DiscordOctober 16, 2025October 16, 2025

🙄 OMG, get ready to clutch your pearls, because those Grammy-hoarding, allegedly “progressive” (debatable, tbh) music titans, DREAM THEATER, are…

Diane Keaton, Queen of Quirky Rom-Coms, Kicks the Bucket at a Respectable 79
Breaking, Movie News

Diane Keaton, Queen of Quirky Rom-Coms, Kicks the Bucket at a Respectable 79

FinnOctober 11, 2025October 11, 2025

OMG! 😱 Like, can you even believe it? Diane Keaton, or whatever, croaked! 💀 Apparently, this happened on Saturday, October…

FLOTSAM AND JETSAM Finally Found a Label Dumb Enough to Sign Them; New Album to Grace Our Ears in the Distant Future of 2026
Breaking, Music News

FLOTSAM AND JETSAM Finally Found a Label Dumb Enough to Sign Them; New Album to Grace Our Ears in the Distant Future of 2026

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 29, 2025September 29, 2025

OMG! 😱 Fresh off their ‘successful’ (debatable) European tour, those Arizona thrash metal dinosaurs, FLOTSAM AND JETSAM, have crawled out…

Mötley Crüe Throws a Party for 40 Years of ‘Theatre of Pain’ (Because Apparently, We Haven’t Suffered Enough)
Breaking, Music News

Mötley Crüe Throws a Party for 40 Years of ‘Theatre of Pain’ (Because Apparently, We Haven’t Suffered Enough)

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 26, 2025September 26, 2025

MÖTLEY CRÜE, those geriatrics who somehow haven’t kicked the bucket yet, 👴🏻👵🏻 announced today a “special” 40th-anniversary limited-edition deluxe box…

Tears For Fears’ “Songs From The Big Chair” Turns 40, Still Not Actually A Chair
Breaking, Music News

Tears For Fears’ “Songs From The Big Chair” Turns 40, Still Not Actually A Chair

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 23, 2025September 23, 2025

OMG! 😱 Another 40th-anniversary edition of Songs From The Big Chair – by those TOTALLY obscure guys, Tears For Fears…

Gamescom 2025: “Routine”—Yeah, Sure, Another “Survival Horror Classic” In The Making
Breaking, Games News

Gamescom 2025: “Routine”—Yeah, Sure, Another “Survival Horror Classic” In The Making

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 13, 2025September 13, 2025

OMG 😱! After a geological epoch—more than a decade, you peasants!—Routine, the game that’s been more vaporware than actual ware,…

‘Back to the Future’ AGAIN?! As If We Haven’t Suffered Enough
Breaking, Movie News

‘Back to the Future’ AGAIN?! As If We Haven’t Suffered Enough

FinnAugust 31, 2025August 31, 2025

OMG 😱! Did you know that if *Back to the Future* was made TODAY 🗓️, Marty McFly would travel back…

Oh Great, Another Mario Merch Mountain to Climb, Japan Gets First Dibs
Breaking, Games News

Oh Great, Another Mario Merch Mountain to Climb, Japan Gets First Dibs

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 8, 2025August 8, 2025

Alright, listen up, you overgrown toddlers! 🍄 Nintendo, in its infinite wisdom (or perhaps fueled by copious amounts of sake…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 3 4

Latest posts

  • ISIS Claims Responsibility For Reflecting Pool Algae
  • Obama Library Cruelly Disenfranchises Millions Of Black Americans By Requiring Photo ID For Entry
  • Cringe: Out-Of-Touch Company Posts Pride Logo Like It’s 2014 Or Something
  • Liberal snowflakes freak out over Trump’s impending election domination wins
  • Liberal actor whines about Juneteenth being supposedly erased by Trump

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}