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Tag: Family

Alpha – Julia Ducournau’s latest masterpiece is here to ruin your appetite and your mom’s opinion of French cinema
Breaking, Movie News

Alpha – Julia Ducournau’s latest masterpiece is here to ruin your appetite and your mom’s opinion of French cinema

FinnDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

Alpha is a new French film written and directed by Julia Ducournau (Titane). The film stars Mélissa Boros, Golshifteh Farahani,…

Control Resonant – Watch the trailer for the new game from Remedy Entertainment, a masterpiece that will surely break your brain and your graphics card in the best way possible
Breaking, Movie News

Control Resonant – Watch the trailer for the new game from Remedy Entertainment, a masterpiece that will surely break your brain and your graphics card in the best way possible

FinnDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

Hold onto your tinfoil hats, folks, because Remedy Entertainment just dropped a sequel so mind-bending that it might actually cause…

Gavin Rossdale’s 12 Days of Dogmas: Because Even Bushes Need to Rescue Puppies
Breaking, Music News

Gavin Rossdale’s 12 Days of Dogmas: Because Even Bushes Need to Rescue Puppies

Chord F. DiscordDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

🎸🐾 Rock Star Gives Up Guitar Solos to Become Professional Dog Influencer in “12 Days of Dogmas” Campaign 🐶📸 In…

JOHN COOPER: SKILLET’s New Album Will Prog-It-Up Like A Crockpot Full Of Metal
Breaking, Music News

JOHN COOPER: SKILLET’s New Album Will Prog-It-Up Like A Crockpot Full Of Metal

Chord F. DiscordDecember 14, 2025December 14, 2025

SKILLET Frontman John Cooper Drops Bombshell: “We Might Do Something Cool in 2026… Maybe. If We Remember.” 🎸💥 In a…

Events

Motivational Interviewing – How to Gaslight People Into Being Better (12-17-25) VIRTUAL

Chuck B. BallsyDecember 14, 2025

🚨BREAKING: Ohio’s State-Sponsored Motivational Interviewing Class Now Accepting Applications from the Slightly Curious (But Not Too Curious—We’re Watching You)🚨 📅…

Director of Unauthorized Wayne Static Biopic Fires Back at Estate After They Said “No”
Breaking, Movie News, Music News

Director of Unauthorized Wayne Static Biopic Fires Back at Estate After They Said “No”

Chord F. DiscordDecember 13, 2025December 13, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: The Ghosts of Wayne Static and Tera Wray Are About to Star in a Documentary Drama So Juicy…

Mike Portnoy Says Dream Theater Will Finally Remember How to Write Songs Again in Late 2026
Breaking, Music News

Mike Portnoy Says Dream Theater Will Finally Remember How to Write Songs Again in Late 2026

Chord F. DiscordDecember 13, 2025December 13, 2025

Mike Portnoy, the drummer who left DREAM THEATER over a decade ago, has returned like a prodigal son who forgot…

New Christmas Movies to Watch in 2025 (Because Netflix Finally Ran Out of Reality Shows)
Breaking, Movie News

New Christmas Movies to Watch in 2025 (Because Netflix Finally Ran Out of Reality Shows)

FinnDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

‘Tis the season for brand new Christmas movies, because apparently, we haven’t suffered enough yet. 🎄 As we plunge headfirst…

MAX CAVALERA: ‘I Love The Fact That I Introduced Brazilian Culture To Americans And Europeans’ Through My Music… And Now They Think I’m A Samba Ambassador
Breaking, Music News

MAX CAVALERA: ‘I Love The Fact That I Introduced Brazilian Culture To Americans And Europeans’ Through My Music… And Now They Think I’m A Samba Ambassador

Chord F. DiscordDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Max Cavalera Claims To Be The Only Good Thing To Come Out Of Brazil (Besides Caipirinhas And Soccer…

Commander Quits After Being Out-Boat-Striked by Hegseth in Caribbean Power Struggle
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Commander Quits After Being Out-Boat-Striked by Hegseth in Caribbean Power Struggle

Big ElephantDecember 12, 2025December 12, 2025

Adm. Alvin Holsey, the commander of US Southern Command who reportedly clashed with Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth over the legality…

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Latest posts

  • Trump’s doc says get moving fatty but he’s totally fine naturally
  • Liberal Erin Brockovich suddenly cares about America’s tech progress somehow
  • Life Coaching for the Hopelessly Lost and Clueless People
  • Get Ready for Another Overpriced Wellness Fad Inner Wisdom Labyrinth Coming to Totally Not Rip You Off This Summer
  • Women Should Totally Settle For Less Because Who Needs Self Respect Anyway

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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