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Exclusive: ICE Just Gave the Des Moines Superintendent an All-Expenses-Paid Vacation (Destination: Detention)
Elephant Reads CNN

Exclusive: ICE Just Gave the Des Moines Superintendent an All-Expenses-Paid Vacation (Destination: Detention)

Big ElephantSeptember 26, 2025September 26, 2025

Another day, another illegal alien running a school system, thanks to the radical left! Ian Roberts, the superintendent of Des…

Gerard Butler and Morena Baccarin, Still Alive, Still Dumb, and Still Searching for a Place to Live in ‘Greenland 2: Migration’ Trailer
Breaking, Movie News

Gerard Butler and Morena Baccarin, Still Alive, Still Dumb, and Still Searching for a Place to Live in ‘Greenland 2: Migration’ Trailer

FinnSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Oh, sweet! Another disaster movie starring Gerard Butler? 🙄 You know, because the world *totally* needed a sequel to “Greenland.”…

Brace Yourselves, Emo Babies: Linkin Park Lullabies Are Coming to Gently Rock You Into an Existential Crisis This Friday; Prepare for Animated ‘In The End’ Video That’s More Depressing Than Your Naptime
Breaking, Music News

Brace Yourselves, Emo Babies: Linkin Park Lullabies Are Coming to Gently Rock You Into an Existential Crisis This Friday; Prepare for Animated ‘In The End’ Video That’s More Depressing Than Your Naptime

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Well, well, well, what have we here? 🤪 On September 26, prepare yourselves for the auditory equivalent of decaf coffee:…

Isle of Man Honors Prog Rock Keyboardist With Stamps Featuring Yes Art, Because Why Not
Breaking, Music News

Isle of Man Honors Prog Rock Keyboardist With Stamps Featuring Yes Art, Because Why Not

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Okay, boomer, prepare to have your mind blown 🤯 by the most groundbreaking, earth-shattering news since sliced bread: Some relics…

Breaking: Orange Man About to Make Your Favorite Chinese Spy App Great Again
Elephant Reads CNN

Breaking: Orange Man About to Make Your Favorite Chinese Spy App Great Again

Big ElephantSeptember 25, 2025September 25, 2025

Another victory for President Trump! He’s playing 4D chess while the Libs are still trying to figure out how to…

🔥 Lorna Shore LIVE in Greensboro, NC | Sep 23, 2025 | Full Power Show 🤘🎤🎶
Videos

🔥 Lorna Shore LIVE in Greensboro, NC | Sep 23, 2025 | Full Power Show 🤘🎤🎶

Chuck B. BallsySeptember 24, 2025

Lorna Shore took over the stage at Greensboro Complex Arena on September 23, 2025! 🏟️ The arena was almost completely…

John Boyega FINALLY Admits ‘Star Wars’ Sequels Were a Galactic-Sized Oopsie
Breaking, Movie News

John Boyega FINALLY Admits ‘Star Wars’ Sequels Were a Galactic-Sized Oopsie

FinnSeptember 24, 2025September 24, 2025

🤣 Oh, honey, John Boyega is STILL talking about Disney’s Star Wars sequel trilogy? Bless his heart. Someone get this…

OMG! Is Comey Gonna Get a Time-Out for Fibbing to Congress
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Is Comey Gonna Get a Time-Out for Fibbing to Congress

Big ElephantSeptember 24, 2025September 24, 2025

Lock him up! Looks like the Deep State swamp rat James Comey might finally face justice for his role in…

Trump throws Twitter tantrum at ABC, accidentally proves Kimmel’s comedic genius while MAGA morons weep
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump throws Twitter tantrum at ABC, accidentally proves Kimmel’s comedic genius while MAGA morons weep

Big ElephantSeptember 24, 2025September 24, 2025

Here we go again, folks! The liberal media is at it, trying to make President Trump look like a dictator…

Jimmy Kimmel Gets Back to Work, Audience Claps Like Trained Seals, Sources Say
Elephant Reads CNN

Jimmy Kimmel Gets Back to Work, Audience Claps Like Trained Seals, Sources Say

Big ElephantSeptember 24, 2025September 24, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? Jimmy Kimmel, that purveyor of leftist propaganda, is back on the air! After a WHOLE…

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Latest posts

  • Amazon Abruptly Cancels Movie About Sam Altman Because Let’s Be Real Who Cares About Some Guy and His AI Company Anyway
  • Gang of Dragon Still NOT Dead Because Let’s Be Real Who Needs Founders Anyway Nagoshi Studio Is Totally Fine Without Them
  • Breaking News: Fallout Season 3 Just Became 1000% More Interesting Because They Added Some Guy from That One Show Your Nephew Watches Manny Jacinto
  • BEARTOOTH Finally Decides to Release Actual Bulls*** From Their Super Original and Not at All Overhyped ‘Pure Ecstasy’ Album That Will Definitely Change the Face of Music Forever
  • SKUNK ANANSIE Still Trying to be Relevant Releases Super Original Not at All a Cry for Help New Take On ‘Meltdown’ With ‘Blackhill Remix’ That You’ll Definitely Listen to More Than Once

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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