Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Events
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
  • Games News
  • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: horror

Nancy Wilson Whines About Trump Stealing HEART’s ‘Barracuda’ for His Pathetic Military Parade No-No
Breaking, Music News

Nancy Wilson Whines About Trump Stealing HEART’s ‘Barracuda’ for His Pathetic Military Parade No-No

Chord F. DiscordJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

OMG! 😱 HEART guitarist Nancy Wilson is SO triggered! She’s totally losing it because the Trump administration dared to play…

Start Your Week Dumber: Minnesota Oopsie, Tantruming Toddlers Say ‘No Kings,’ DC’s Tin Foil Parade, Rich People’s Club, Ball Bashing Bonanza
Elephant Reads CNN

Start Your Week Dumber: Minnesota Oopsie, Tantruming Toddlers Say ‘No Kings,’ DC’s Tin Foil Parade, Rich People’s Club, Ball Bashing Bonanza

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Ah, Father’s Day, when dads across the nation are celebrated for their… well, for not being moms. Enjoy your participation…

Israel’s cribs get a makeover, courtesy of Iran’s drone and missile delivery service
Elephant Reads CNN

Israel’s cribs get a makeover, courtesy of Iran’s drone and missile delivery service

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, the horror! Iran finally did something besides whine about Trump! They actually attacked Israel. But don’t worry, I’m sure…

G7 Summit: Elites Yakking About Money (Like We Care)
Elephant Reads CNN

G7 Summit: Elites Yakking About Money (Like We Care)

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

CNN reports that the annual G7 summit in Canada will be overshadowed by trade tensions, just days after Israel’s strike…

Miami Student’s Wild Night: From South Beach to Six Feet Under, Mom’s Got Thoughts
Elephant Reads CNN

Miami Student’s Wild Night: From South Beach to Six Feet Under, Mom’s Got Thoughts

Big ElephantJune 15, 2025June 15, 2025

Oh, the horror! A young, innocent college student falls prey to the clutches of the godless Left and their dangerous…

Hell Is Us: Because Apparently We Didn’t Learn Anything From Dante, Oops!
Breaking, Games News

Hell Is Us: Because Apparently We Didn’t Learn Anything From Dante, Oops!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 14, 2025June 14, 2025

Okay, so these guys, fresh from their *totally* amazing work on Warhammer (you know, the one that definitely didn’t have…

Trump’s “Are You Even American?” Voting Order Gets Epicly Blocked by Judge
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s “Are You Even American?” Voting Order Gets Epicly Blocked by Judge

Big ElephantJune 13, 2025June 13, 2025

Another day, another Obama-appointed judge (quelle surprise!) kneecapping President Trump’s efforts to MAGA. This time, Judge Denise Casper—probably a secret…

Alice Cooper’s Band Reunion: So Smooth, It’s Practically Buttered Toast
Breaking, Music News

Alice Cooper’s Band Reunion: So Smooth, It’s Practically Buttered Toast

Chord F. DiscordJune 13, 2025June 12, 2025

In an EXCLUSIVE interview with 95.5 KLOS radio’s own dinosaur 🦖, Frazer Smith, the one and only Alice Cooper (who’s…

Dying Light: Beast Mode—Run, Punch, Puke, Repeat
Breaking, Games News

Dying Light: Beast Mode—Run, Punch, Puke, Repeat

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 12, 2025June 12, 2025

Oh boy, another Dying Light game! 🙄 Because we totally needed more zombies, am I right? The Dying Light franchise…

Cronos: Bloober Team’s “Darkest Vision” or Just a Really Bad Hangover Cure at Game Con Canada
Breaking, Games News

Cronos: Bloober Team’s “Darkest Vision” or Just a Really Bad Hangover Cure at Game Con Canada

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJune 12, 2025June 12, 2025

Ah, Game Con Canada, the place where dreams go to die and indie devs desperately shill their wares! 🤪 Bloober…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 56 57 58 … 64 Next

Latest posts

  • Goregrind vocalists🤘 looking for inspiration:
  • Cybersécurité pour les Nuls qui Croient encore que leur Mot de Passe Secret est Réellement Secret
  • California Announces They Have Finished Counting The Votes, Ronald Reagan Has Won The 1966 Governor’s Race
  • ’60 Minutes’ Begins Search For New Pompous Blowhard
  • When You Get the Right Uber Driver 🤘

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
June 2026
S M T W T F S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  
« May    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}