Super Mario Galaxy Movie Invades Cosmos With Fox McCloud, Because Why Not Throw Star Fox Into the Mix?
Oh look, Nintendo decided to drop a new character poster right before the release of *The Super Mario Galaxy Movie*,…
Tag: Internet
Metacritic Crowns Game Publishers of 2025: Square Enix Steals the Throne Like a Chocobo Thief
Well, well, well, look who decided to grace us with their annual “we crunched some numbers and here’s who’s best”…
Pokémon Champions: Because Who Needs a Full Game When You Can Pay for the Privilege? Coming April 8 to Your Wallet’s Doom!
Oh, great, another Pokémon game—because clearly, what the world needs now is more ways to watch little creatures punch each…
New Shows That’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices and Cancel All Your Plans This Week
Oh, look! Another week, another avalanche of TV shows flooding our lives like a dumpster fire we can’t look away…
SIX FEET UNDER’s JACK OWEN: CHRIS BARNES Is ‘Very Approachable’ And ‘Very Relatable’ (Because He’s Not Actually A Zombie)
In a shocking revelation that has the metal community clutching their chest plates in disbelief, Jack Owen of SIX FEET…
ABC’s Epic Fail: How Much Cash They’re Flushing by Skipping ‘Bachelorette’ Season 22 and Making Us All Sad
Hold on to your artisanal rosé, folks — ABC just learned the hard way that reality TV drama comes with…
Chuck Norris, Walker Texas Ranger Legend, Finally Gets Tired of Kicking Death in the Face at 86
Chuck Norris, the human embodiment of the phrase “Don’t mess with Texas,” has finally met his match—Father Time. Yes, you…
Fortnite Finally Back on Google Play: Gamers Celebrate, Parents Weep Quietly
After five long years and courtroom battles, Fortnite has finally returned to the Google Play Store today, just in time…
Iranians Experience “Offline Forever” Mode: Internet Blackout Turns into an Extended Digital Detox
Breaking News: Iran’s Internet Blackout Proves Trump’s Sanctions Are Working! Well, well, well, look who’s crying about a little internet…
The Absolute *Shocking* Oscar Winners That Make Us Question Humanity’s Taste
Okay, let’s get this straight. The Academy Awards are meant to be the pinnacle of cinematic achievement—the gold standard for…