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Nation Rebrands As America Because Why Not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Nation Rebrands As America Because Why Not

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2026

So, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about President Trump’s latest antics on CNN, and I come across this article…

Duran Duran gets stamps because their farewell tour isn’t lasting forever apparently
Breaking, Music News

Duran Duran gets stamps because their farewell tour isn’t lasting forever apparently

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

Well, well, well, it seems like another day, another chance for a band to revisit their glory days and cash…

Oh Joy Another Remake of Carrie Because the World Was Just Missing a TV Version of a Movie That’s Already Been Done to Death
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Remake of Carrie Because the World Was Just Missing a TV Version of a Movie That’s Already Been Done to Death

FinnSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some telekinetic teenage angst? 🤯 Because Prime Video just dropped the official trailer…

Oh Joy Another Movie with Kenneth Branagh Being Kenneth Branagh and Some Other People Youve Never Heard Of
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Movie with Kenneth Branagh Being Kenneth Branagh and Some Other People Youve Never Heard Of

FinnSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

We’ve got a real tear-jerker for you, folks! 🎥👀 The new movie “Atonement” is coming out, and it’s all about…

Politicians Manage Not To Ruin 9/11 Ceremony Somehow
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Politicians Manage Not To Ruin 9/11 Ceremony Somehow

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like the 25th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks is…

SLIPKNOT Blesses Us With Another Song To Add To Our Angsty Teenage Playlists
Breaking, Music News

SLIPKNOT Blesses Us With Another Song To Add To Our Angsty Teenage Playlists

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

Oh boy,!!!!! It’s finally here! SLIPKNOT has unleashed their brand new song “Arsenal” and I’m not sure if the world…

LIVE NATION heroically cancels AC/DC concert to protect Toronto from possibly getting rocked too hard
Breaking, Music News

LIVE NATION heroically cancels AC/DC concert to protect Toronto from possibly getting rocked too hard

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

I mean, it’s not like we’ve never seen a storm before, but apparently, the one that hit Toronto last week…

Trump Administration Gets Sued For Being Super Cool To Animals
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Administration Gets Sued For Being Super Cool To Animals

Big ElephantSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. It seems like the Trump administration is in the hot seat…

Oh Joy Another Cold War Thriller to Make You Feel Like You’re Stuck in a Time Loop of Spy Movies
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Cold War Thriller to Make You Feel Like You’re Stuck in a Time Loop of Spy Movies

FinnSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

The most epic and thrilling movie of the century is finally here, and I’m not even being sarcastic (or am…

TIFF 2026 Review: Hope – “because who needs a decent plot when the cinematography is on point and the fancy camera angles will distract you from the crushing existential dread”
Breaking, Movie News

TIFF 2026 Review: Hope – “because who needs a decent plot when the cinematography is on point and the fancy camera angles will distract you from the crushing existential dread”

FinnSeptember 10, 2026September 10, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys in for a treat! 🎉 The movie “Hope” is like a wild rollercoaster ride of…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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