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Live

OUTLAWS & LEGENDS MUSIC FESTIVAL ~ 15th ANNIVERSARY (WHERE LEGENDS OUTLAW THE OUTLAWS)

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 13, 2026

The Biggest 1-Stage Event in Texas returns to the Back Porch of Texas for its 15th Outlaws & Legends Music…

Live

Global Culinary Conference 2026: Chefs Unite to Debate Whether Pineapple Belongs on Pizza

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 12, 2026

**2026 Global Culinary Conference** *Hosted by Feed the Soul Foundation, because clearly we all need therapy through food* **📍 Anderson-Clarke…

Oh look, turns out Trump’s tariffs are just a fancy way of making Americans pay for their own wallets to be lighter!
The Tariffs Are Working! Oh Wait, They're Not
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Oh look, turns out Trump’s tariffs are just a fancy way of making Americans pay for their own wallets to be lighter!

Big ElephantFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

Well, well, well, look who’s finally admitting what we’ve known all along! The deep state at the Federal Reserve Bank…

Minneapolis Enforcement Surge Ends, Leaving State and DHS Officials Sweating Bullets in Senate Hot Seat
Minnesota Dems Cower as Border Czar Homan Calls Off Liberal Snowflake Protest Circus
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Minneapolis Enforcement Surge Ends, Leaving State and DHS Officials Sweating Bullets in Senate Hot Seat

Big ElephantFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

After months of liberal tantrums and fake news hysteria, President Trump’s tough border czar Tom Homan has mercifully announced the…

Nicolas Cage is Back to Ruin Spider-Noir Like Only He Can
Breaking, Movie News

Nicolas Cage is Back to Ruin Spider-Noir Like Only He Can

FinnFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

Oh great, another day, another Spider-Man spin-off nobody asked for—but this time, Nicolas Cage is swinging in like a drunken…

SUZI QUATRO, At 75, Still Rocking Like She Owes the Grim Reaper Rent: ‘You Can’t Get Rid Of Me Yet’
Suzi Quatro: Still Rocking at 75, and Yes, Her Ass Still Shakes
Breaking, Music News

SUZI QUATRO, At 75, Still Rocking Like She Owes the Grim Reaper Rent: ‘You Can’t Get Rid Of Me Yet’

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

In a shocking revelation that has absolutely no one surprised, Suzi Quatro has announced she’s still got it at 75.…

California Schemin’ – McAvoy’s Directorial Debut: Watch the Trailer That’ll Make You Say “Aye, McAvoy!”
Oh look, another "based on a true story" film that’s probably 80% fiction and 20% "we saw it on TikTok once"
Breaking, Movie News

California Schemin’ – McAvoy’s Directorial Debut: Watch the Trailer That’ll Make You Say “Aye, McAvoy!”

FinnFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

STUDIOCANAL, the company that clearly has too much money and not enough original ideas, has graced us with a brand-new…

NEVERMORE Unleashes Phoenix-Wielding New Lineup, Signs with REIGNING PHOENIX MUSIC Because Why Not
NEVERMORE Returns From The Dead, Because Apparently Money And Music Still Exist
Breaking, Music News

NEVERMORE Unleashes Phoenix-Wielding New Lineup, Signs with REIGNING PHOENIX MUSIC Because Why Not

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

In a stunning revelation that absolutely no one saw coming, NEVERMORE has resurrected itself from the grave of broken bands…

Diablo 30th Anniversary Spotlight: Warlock Class Finally Arrives to Ruin Your Build—Again!
The Warlock Has Arrived: Diablo's 30th Birthday Bash Brings More Demons Than Your Ex's Group Chat
Breaking, Games News

Diablo 30th Anniversary Spotlight: Warlock Class Finally Arrives to Ruin Your Build—Again!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

Well, well, well… Diablo just turned 30, and instead of buying it a nice bottle of whiskey, Blizzard decided to…

HGTV Cancels Rehab Addict Because Host’s Vocabulary Was the Only Thing in Need of a Makeover
Breaking

HGTV Cancels Rehab Addict Because Host’s Vocabulary Was the Only Thing in Need of a Makeover

FinnFebruary 12, 2026February 12, 2026

HGTV, the network that brings you hours of people arguing about granite countertops, has decided to renovate its own reputation…

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Latest posts

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  • Jason Newsted Abandons Dignity To Tour With The Chophouse Band Because You Clearly Needed This

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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