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Legendary Nintendo Designer Takashi Tezuka Finally Tired of Making the Same Mario Game for 42 Years
The End of an Era: Nintendo's Takashi Tezuka Retires, and We're All Doomed 🌪️
Breaking, Games News

Legendary Nintendo Designer Takashi Tezuka Finally Tired of Making the Same Mario Game for 42 Years

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

The gaming world is mourning the loss of a legend, as Takashi Tezuka, the mastermind behind Mario and The Legend…

RAUNCHY Finally Emerges From Their Parents Basement To Release Music Video For Overhyped Comeback Single ‘Designed Despair Because We Clearly Ran Out of Ideas’
Breaking, Music News

RAUNCHY Finally Emerges From Their Parents Basement To Release Music Video For Overhyped Comeback Single ‘Designed Despair Because We Clearly Ran Out of Ideas’

Chord F. DiscordMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

Get ready to have your face melted by the most epic music video of the year, folks! 🤯 Danish metal…

Disney+ Randomly Decides to Ruin Your Life by Ending The Bear This June Because Who Needs Happiness Anyway
Breaking, Movie News

Disney+ Randomly Decides to Ruin Your Life by Ending The Bear This June Because Who Needs Happiness Anyway

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

Breaking news, folks! 🚨️ The final season of The Bear is coming to Disney+ this summer, and we’re all just…

Fake news targets heroic cop with witch hunt leftist agenda
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Fake news targets heroic cop with witch hunt leftist agenda

Big ElephantMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

Oh, great, just what we need, another bunch of fake news outlets spewing their liberal nonsense about our great President…

Liberal Wind Mills Fail Again What A Total Joke
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Liberal Wind Mills Fail Again What A Total Joke

Big ElephantMay 8, 2026May 8, 2026

It’s absolutely hilarious to see the so-called “experts” and “fact-checkers” still trying to spin their fake news about our great…

Xbox Just Announced the Most Overhyped Game Ever and It’s a Yakuza Prequel Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough of Those, Plus a Cast That’s More Star-Studded Than Your Grandma’s Quilt and a Release Window That’s Totally Not Getting Delayed
Breaking, Games News

Xbox Just Announced the Most Overhyped Game Ever and It’s a Yakuza Prequel Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough of Those, Plus a Cast That’s More Star-Studded Than Your Grandma’s Quilt and a Release Window That’s Totally Not Getting Delayed

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

Xbox’s long-awaited Stranger Than Heaven presentation finally dropped, and boy, was it a wild ride 🎢! The biggest question on…

Wow, infected libtards sail to socialist paradise
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Wow, infected libtards sail to socialist paradise

Big ElephantMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

It’s 2026 and our great nation is still thriving under the magnificent leadership of President Donald Trump, the best President…

Pentagon vows to not totally abuse AI obviously
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Pentagon vows to not totally abuse AI obviously

Big ElephantMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

It’s 2026 and our great nation is still thriving under the magnificent leadership of President Donald Trump, the best president…

L7 Embarks on ‘The Last Hurrah’ Tour Because You Clearly Didn’t Get Enough of Them the First Time Around
Breaking, Events, Music News

L7 Embarks on ‘The Last Hurrah’ Tour Because You Clearly Didn’t Get Enough of Them the First Time Around

Chord F. DiscordMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

The iconic feminist rock band L7 has just announced their final world tour, “The Last Hurrah Tour”, and we’re all…

DAVE MUSTAINE: JAMES HETFIELD And I Were Basically The Dynamic Duo Of Metal Except When We Weren’t And I Got Kicked Out
Breaking, Music News

DAVE MUSTAINE: JAMES HETFIELD And I Were Basically The Dynamic Duo Of Metal Except When We Weren’t And I Got Kicked Out

Chord F. DiscordMay 7, 2026May 7, 2026

Breaking news: Dave Mustaine is retiring from music due to a condition that’s making it hard for him to play…

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Latest posts

  • Why Every Band Announces A Farewell Tour And Never Leaves
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  • Duran Duran’s umpteenth farewell gift, Free To Love remixed to death apparently
  • More Unnecessary Sequels Abound Resonance Plague Tale Is Back

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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