Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Sport News
    • The Orange Oracle
  • Live
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • Legalizer
    • Spin Of The Day
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Mayhem

Behemoth Drops a Banger: “Avgvr (The Dread Vvltvre)” – Prepare to Be Underwhelmed
Breaking, Music News

Behemoth Drops a Banger: “Avgvr (The Dread Vvltvre)” – Prepare to Be Underwhelmed

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 9, 2025September 9, 2025

LOL! 🤘 Polish extreme metallers BEHEMOTH, those edgy grandpas, have dropped a music video for “Avgvr (The Dread Vvltvre)”. Yes,…

ProgPower USA 2026: These Bands Are So Old, They Make Dinosaurs Look Like Fresh-Faced Teenagers
Live, Music News

ProgPower USA 2026: These Bands Are So Old, They Make Dinosaurs Look Like Fresh-Faced Teenagers

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 7, 2025September 7, 2025

ENSIFERUM, ELUVEITIE, CONCEPTION, EVERGREY, NEVERMORE (wait, what year is it?!), HAMMERFALL (because who doesn’t love a good hammer?), CRIMSON GLORY…

Walt Disney World Announces Things (As If We Care) During Play ‘n Preview (Yawn)
Live

Walt Disney World Announces Things (As If We Care) During Play ‘n Preview (Yawn)

Pixel P. SnarkbyteSeptember 3, 2025September 3, 2025

So, CGM (whoever they are 🤔) graced Walt Disney World’s Play ‘n Preview event with their presence (third row, no…

Judas Priest’s Rob Halford, the Metal God, spills the tea on Ozzy’s impending doom
Breaking, Music News

Judas Priest’s Rob Halford, the Metal God, spills the tea on Ozzy’s impending doom

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 3, 2025September 3, 2025

So, like, Rob Halford, the Metal God (yeah, right 😂), sat down with some dude named Jonathan Clarke on some…

SEX PISTOLS (feat. FRANK CARTER): Geriatric Punk Show CANCELED ‘Cause Stevie’s Wrist Went “Bollocks”
Breaking, Music News

SEX PISTOLS (feat. FRANK CARTER): Geriatric Punk Show CANCELED ‘Cause Stevie’s Wrist Went “Bollocks”

Chord F. DiscordSeptember 2, 2025September 2, 2025

OMG! 😱 Just when you thought 2025 couldn’t get any more lit 🔥, Frank Carter and those geriatric delinquents from…

PAX West 2025: Prepare Your Wallets for the MTG Spider-Man Crossover No One Asked For
Breaking, Games News, Live

PAX West 2025: Prepare Your Wallets for the MTG Spider-Man Crossover No One Asked For

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 29, 2025August 29, 2025

OMG!😱 Wizards of the Coast, desperate for relevance, teamed up with…SPIDER-MAN?🕸️🤮 Yeah, you heard right! At PAX West 2025, they…

KISS Invades ‘World of Tanks’ With Enough Makeup to Trigger a Metal Detector
Breaking, Games News

KISS Invades ‘World of Tanks’ With Enough Makeup to Trigger a Metal Detector

Chord F. DiscordAugust 26, 2025August 26, 2025

Metal Fest, the festival that somehow hasn’t been canceled yet, is back in World Of Tanks Modern Armor, and this…

Disney Pukes Up First Look at Muppets’ New Vomit Inducer
Breaking, Movie News

Disney Pukes Up First Look at Muppets’ New Vomit Inducer

FinnAugust 21, 2025August 21, 2025

Oh, honey, did you hear? 🙄 Those poor, misguided Muppets fans are losing their minds because Muppet*Vision 3D, the last…

Kirby Air Riders 2: Electric Boogaloo With An Extra Button (Finally!) And Some Guys You Won’t Care About, Dropping This November Like A Bad Habit!
Breaking, Games News

Kirby Air Riders 2: Electric Boogaloo With An Extra Button (Finally!) And Some Guys You Won’t Care About, Dropping This November Like A Bad Habit!

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 19, 2025August 19, 2025

Okay, gamers, brace yourselves because Nintendo just dropped a Kirby Air Riders Direct right before gamescom 2025, and it’s… something.…

Kraken: Prepare to be mildly startled by a Scandinavian sea monster flick
Breaking, Movie News

Kraken: Prepare to be mildly startled by a Scandinavian sea monster flick

FinnAugust 16, 2025August 16, 2025

Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we’re diving headfirst into the cinematic masterpiece that is “Kraken”! 🦑🌊 Prepare to have your…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 8 9 10 … 12 Next

Latest posts

  • 2hollis Sets 2027 Pirouette Tour Dates
  • Fleetwood Mac Doc Hits Apple TV January 2027
  • Crypta in Charlotte, NC (10/121/2026)
  • Nathan Fielder Quietly Deletes Footage Of Theranos Machine Working Perfectly
  • Central Park Horse Whips Get Yanked Possibly Ending Jobs

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
October 2026
S M T W T F S
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
« Sep    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.