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Tag: money

MEGADETH Sumo-Sized Fail: Round 2 of Embarrassment
Breaking, Movie News

MEGADETH Sumo-Sized Fail: Round 2 of Embarrassment

Chord F. DiscordJuly 8, 2025July 8, 2025

Oh my god, can you even believe this? MEGADETH, those geriatric thrash metal dudes, are STILL trying to stay relevant…

Dead by Daylight and Walking Dead Team Up to Traumatize You More
Breaking, Games News

Dead by Daylight and Walking Dead Team Up to Traumatize You More

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, look, another Dead by Daylight crossover. 🙄 Because what this game REALLY needs is MORE content instead of, you…

Vivian Campbell’s Ego Trip: Ronnie James Dio Edition
Breaking, Music News

Vivian Campbell’s Ego Trip: Ronnie James Dio Edition

Chord F. DiscordJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

So, Vivian Campbell, the dude who used to shred for DIO and now warms up the stage for DEF LEPPARD,…

Nintendo Panics: Desperate Measures to Keep You From Starving After Buying Our Games
Breaking, Games News

Nintendo Panics: Desperate Measures to Keep You From Starving After Buying Our Games

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

Oh, sweet innocent gamers, gather ’round! Uncle Nintendo, bless his heart, is here to soothe your fragile wallets regarding the…

Randy Blythe of LAMB OF GOD Thinks His Day Was, Like, Totally Unbelievable, Man
Breaking, Music News

Randy Blythe of LAMB OF GOD Thinks His Day Was, Like, Totally Unbelievable, Man

Chord F. DiscordJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

So, LAMB OF GOD, bless their little metal hearts, got to play at Ozzy Osbourne’s “farewell” (yeah, right, we’ve heard…

SLAYER’s Back, Apparently London Didn’t Suffer Enough The First Time
Breaking, Music News

SLAYER’s Back, Apparently London Didn’t Suffer Enough The First Time

Chord F. DiscordJuly 7, 2025July 7, 2025

So, the geriatric thrash metal “legends” 👴 SLAYER, fresh from their crypts, decided to grace us with their presence for…

NYT: Sportsball watchers willingly throw away $4,785 annually | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

NYT: Sportsball watchers willingly throw away $4,785 annually | CNN

Big ElephantJuly 6, 2025July 6, 2025

Another day, another way for the liberal media to whine about capitalism! The New York Times, CNN’s propaganda arm, is…

Daggerheart: Is This the New TTRPG Overlord or Just Another Pretender to the Throne?
Breaking, Games News

Daggerheart: Is This the New TTRPG Overlord or Just Another Pretender to the Throne?

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 6, 2025July 6, 2025

Fifty years ago, some nerd invented Dungeons & Dragons, which, like, totally paved the way for other games where you…

How to Contribute to the Ongoing Texas Waterpark Expansion Project
Elephant Reads CNN

How to Contribute to the Ongoing Texas Waterpark Expansion Project

Big ElephantJuly 5, 2025July 5, 2025

Another “act of God,” or is it the Deep State controlling the weather again? Forty souls lost in Texas, probably…

Elon’s New Political Party: Is This a Joke or Just Another One of His “Brilliant” Ideas
Elephant Reads CNN

Elon’s New Political Party: Is This a Joke or Just Another One of His “Brilliant” Ideas

Big ElephantJuly 5, 2025July 5, 2025

Looks like another snowflake is melting! Elon Musk, once a great ally, has decided to throw a tantrum and form…

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  • All Hail Megatron, the Only Theme Park Meet and Greet Character Who Won’t Judge You for Eating an Entire Churro by Yourself While Crying
  • G7 losers await Trump’s genius Iran deal masterstroke obviously
  • Fake news CNN claims independents abandon patriot party

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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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