Amorphis’s Santteri Kallio Thinks AI Music Videos Are the Future Because He’s Too Lazy to Hire a Director
Oh great, another day on the internet where we’re not just debating whether robots will replace us, but whether they’ll…
Tag: New album
MORTAL SIN’s MAT MAURER Confirms New Music: ‘It’s Been Discussed’ (Translation: ‘We’ve Talked About It Over Beer’)
🚨 BREAKING: Mortal Sin Announces 2026 Return — Because Apparently 15 Years of Peace Wasn’t Enough 🚨 In a move…
SKINDRED’s BENJI WEBBE: ‘I Pump Iron So Hard My Brain Finally Shows Up To Work’
Benji Webbe Just Invented Motivation, And It’s Called ‘You Got This’ (Also, He Goes To The Gym A Lot) In…
NECROBUTCHER Hopes MAYHEM Survives Another Two Decades of Corpse Paint and Chaos
🎵 When Black Metal Meets Retirement Plans: MAYHEM’s Quest to Outlive Their Fans (and Possibly Themselves) 🧓♂️⚰️ In a shocking…
SHINEDOWN’s BARRY KERCH Promises Their Next Album Will Be Just As Confusing As Ever: Buckle Up For Another Identity Crisis
🚨 BREAKING: SHINEDOWN PROMISES NOT TO BORE US WITH ANOTHER CONCEPT ALBUM (WE’RE ALL BERRRRY HAPPY) 🚨 In a stunning…
John Petrucci Says Dream Theater and Fans Are BFFs, Because Apparently Prog Rock Needs a Group Chat
🎸 In a stunning turn of events that absolutely no one saw coming (except everyone with ears and a calendar),…
AGNOSTIC FRONT’s ROGER MIRET Ignores Critics Like His Neighbor’s BBQ Smoke—Just Pretends It Doesn’t Exist
🎸🔥 In a shocking turn of events that absolutely NO ONE saw coming (except literally everyone with ears), AGNOSTIC FRONT’s…
WITHERING SCORN’s New Album: All Done, Just Like Your Last Relationship
🎸 METAL DRUMMER’S NEW BAND FINALLY FINISHES SECOND ALBUM AFTER OMITTING ‘TOO COMMERCIAL’ TRACK 🤘 In a shocking twist that…
KISS Legend PETER CRISS Sells Autographs Like a Used Car Salesman at NYC’s Hipster Petting Zoo
🚨 BREAKING: Peter Criss Releases New Album, Proves That Time Is Just A Social Construct For Rock Gods 🚨 In…
AMY LEE: EVANESCENCE’s New Album Will Arrive In 2026—Just In Time To Save Our Souls From Eternal Silence
Amy Lee, the queen of goth-tastic angst and dramatic piano flourishes, has finally blessed humanity with the news we’ve all…