Oh look, it’s *DROWNING POOL*—that band you forgot existed until “Bodies” randomly plays at a gym and you wonder what happened to them. Guitarist C.J. Pierce has announced they’re finally getting around to doing something for the 25th anniversary of their only successful album, *Sinner*. Revolutionary.
In a recent interview that nobody asked for, C.J. revealed they have “plenty enough songs” for a new album, which is corporate-speak for “we wrote three songs and stretched them into five.” He also mentioned he likes to take his time with guitar solos because he’s an “artist,” not some kind of “look at me” show-off. Sir, you’re in *DROWNING POOL*. You peaked in 2001. The only people “looking at you” are the three remaining fans who still remember your name.
The band plans to tour playing *Sinner* in its entirety, which is great news for the one guy who’s been waiting 25 years to hear “Tear Away” live instead of just “Bodies” for the 87th time. C.J. called the record “the most well-known one,” which is like calling water “the most consumed beverage” or calling Nickelback “the most hated band”—technically accurate but not exactly profound.
They’re also planning to dig through storage to find old demo tapes with late singer Dave Williams, because apparently they’ve been sitting on unreleased material for two and a half decades. C.J. found cassette tapes (yes, actual cassettes, because apparently *DROWNING POOL* is permanently stuck in 2001) featuring early versions of “Bodies” and “Tear Away,” plus a cover of The Beatles’ “Day Tripper” that literally nobody on Earth has ever requested.
The guitarist also discovered signed posters and CDs in storage, which he’s excited to sell to “hardcore fans.” By “hardcore fans,” he means “that one guy who still wears his ‘Sinner’ shirt unironically” and “the dude who yelled ‘LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR’ at a wedding last weekend.”
Ryan McCombs, the current singer who’s also still in SOIL (remember them? No? Exactly.), rejoined DROWNING POOL in 2023, marking his glorious return to the band he left in 2011. He’ll be performing songs written by Dave Williams, which should be interesting considering McCombs has been fronting SOIL for like 87 years and probably can’t remember the words to anything that isn’t about soil.
So mark your calendars for June 5th, 2026, when DROWNING POOL will finally celebrate an album that came out when your little cousin was born, graduated college, and is now asking you to help with their student loans. The band promises “a lot of stuff” for the anniversary, which in band-speak means “maybe we’ll release something, maybe we won’t, but we’ll definitely charge you $75 for a T-shirt.”
Welcome back to relevance, DROWNING POOL. We hardly remembered you were gone.
Chord F. Discord, the Beethoven of Buffoonery, is a self-taught expert in music who once claimed he could “play the kazoo in four languages.”
Born in Crescendo, Indiana, Chord’s first brush with fame came when he accidentally entered a yodeling contest thinking it was a pie-eating competition—and won both categories.
Chord F. Discord: proving that laughter, much like a poorly tuned ukulele, is truly universal.
