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Tag: News

Trump’s Legal Gymnastics: Immunity for Himself, But Lock Her Up (Again)
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s Legal Gymnastics: Immunity for Himself, But Lock Her Up (Again)

Big ElephantJuly 24, 2025July 24, 2025

Oh, the tangled web we weave when we try to drain the swamp! It seems President Trump, in his infinite…

ICE CREAM, CELLPHONES, AND FAT CATS: NEWS SO IMPORTANT, YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT
Elephant Reads CNN

ICE CREAM, CELLPHONES, AND FAT CATS: NEWS SO IMPORTANT, YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT

Big ElephantJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

Folks, another day, another socialist scare from CNN! They’re trying to distract you from President Trump’s incredible leadership, but we…

DualSense Gets Schizophrenic: Now Juggles PS5, PC, and Your Toaster
Breaking, Games News

DualSense Gets Schizophrenic: Now Juggles PS5, PC, and Your Toaster

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

Oh boy, Sony has graced us with another earth-shattering, life-altering, paradigm-shifting PS5 update! 🙄 Prepare yourselves, peasants, because the DualSense…

Xbox Tries Not to Suck: The Outer Worlds 2 Price Plunge and Apology Tour
Breaking, Games News

Xbox Tries Not to Suck: The Outer Worlds 2 Price Plunge and Apology Tour

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

Oh, sweet gamers, gather ’round and feast your eyes on the latest saga of corporate greed and fanboy tears! 😭…

MACHINE HEAD Kicks Off Show with BLACK SABBATH Covers Honoring OZZY (Is This Real Life?)
Breaking, Music News

MACHINE HEAD Kicks Off Show with BLACK SABBATH Covers Honoring OZZY (Is This Real Life?)

Chord F. DiscordJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

San Francisco Bay Area metallers MACHINE HEAD, bless their cotton socks, decided to honor Ozzy Osbourne by butchering two BLACK…

FFT Remake: Square Enix Claims Original Code Lost, Blames Moogles
Breaking, Games News

FFT Remake: Square Enix Claims Original Code Lost, Blames Moogles

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

Oh, honey, bless your heart! Two months before Final Fantasy Tactics: The Ivalice Chronicles launches, PlayStation is desperately trying to…

OMG! Lady Gaga Channels Her Inner Bat-Eating Rockstar: A Hilarious Tribute to Ozzy in San Fran
Breaking, Music News

OMG! Lady Gaga Channels Her Inner Bat-Eating Rockstar: A Hilarious Tribute to Ozzy in San Fran

Chord F. DiscordJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

Pop “superstar” Lady Gaga, bless her heart, decided to “honor” the Prince of Darkness, Ozzy Osbourne, at the grand finale…

Orange Man Still Mad at Black Man, Even Though Dead Pervert Is Involved
Elephant Reads CNN

Orange Man Still Mad at Black Man, Even Though Dead Pervert Is Involved

Big ElephantJuly 23, 2025July 23, 2025

CNN is at it again, folks! They’re trying to make President Trump look bad for calling out Barack Hussein Obama,…

CNN’s hot take: Orange man blames Obama for existing
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN’s hot take: Orange man blames Obama for existing

Big ElephantJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

CNN, that bastion of truth (LOL!), is at it again, trying to defend Obama and the Deep State from the…

Stranger Things: Welcome To The Hellfire Club Summons Nerds To Roll Dice And Avoid Sunlight
Breaking, Movie News

Stranger Things: Welcome To The Hellfire Club Summons Nerds To Roll Dice And Avoid Sunlight

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 22, 2025July 22, 2025

Oh, sweet Vecna, another cash grab! Stranger Things, that show everyone *totally* still cares about, is teaming up with Dungeons…

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