Dead Island 3 Finally Crawling Out of Its Own Grave—Release Date? Not Today, Zombie!
🚨 BREAKING: Dead Island 3 Is Officially In Development, Because Apparently We All Didn’t Learn Our Lesson Last Time 🧟♂️💀…
Tag: RIP
SLAYER Band Biography By D.X. Ferris Finally Deafens Your Ears As An Audiobook
Move over, history books and science textbooks—there’s a new educational powerhouse in town, and it’s screaming at you in double-blast-beat…
Two People found chilling at Rob Reiner’s place because apparently that’s the new Airbnb
🚨 BREAKING NEWS: TWO PEOPLE FOUND DEAD AT ROB REINER’S HOUSE, WHICH IS PROBABLY JUST A NEW SITCOM PILOT 🚨…
“Hold Onto Your Blocks: Minecraft’s New Barely-Controllable Pixel Beasts & MoJank’s Latest Recipe for Chaos!”
🐄 Hold onto your pickaxes, folks, because Minecraft just dropped its latest “content bomb”—Mounts of Mayhem™—and it’s precisely as chaotic…
The Monthly Netflix Firehose: Prepare to Be Drowned in Content You Definitely Don’t Need
🎉 BREAKING NEWS: Bridgerton is back, and so is your will to live after binging it for the 17th time!…
Avantasia’s Tobias Sammet Cries Like A Baby Over The Impending Doom Of Ozzy And Ace (They’re Not Even Dead Yet, What A Drama Queen)
In a groundbreaking interview with Chile’s prestigious SonarFM (a.k.a. the only radio station willing to talk to him), AVANTASIA overlord…
Lion, Witch, Wardrobe: Still milking it!
Afternoon Feature: Narnia (2005) aka a blatant rip-off of every fantasy trope ever conceived. 🙄 Date: 11/30/2025. Time: Doors open…
Jeff Loomis Gaslighting Fans With ‘New’ Nevermore LP (Spoiler: It’s Just Him Shredding Over a Drum Machine)
OMG! 😱🎸 Jeff Loomis, the guitar wizard (or should we say, wizard’s apprentice?) of the shredtastic realm, just yapped about…
Layne Staley’s Diary: Now Good for Something Besides Gathering Dust
OMG! 😱 Did you hear? “This Angry Pen Of Mine: Recovering The Journals Of Layne Staley” – a totally authorized…
Boogie Nights in 4K: Because You Haven’t Seen Enough Fake Penises
Wow, hold onto your hats, folks! Boogie Nights, that cinematic masterpiece (or, you know, just a movie) from 1997 by…