Atomic Heart 2: Electric Boogaloo of Botched Bolshevik Bots and Boomsticks
Okay, gamers, listen up! Atomic Heart was like that one weird dream you had after eating too much borscht and…
Tag: Sequel
Night at the Museum: More Like Day of the Same Old Crud
Oh, great, another reboot! 🙄 Because Hollywood is just overflowing with original ideas, right? 20th Century Studios is apparently so…
James Gunn Doth Bestoweth His Divine Judgment Upon Ye Olde ‘The Batman Part Deux’ Script, Huzzah
OMG! 😱 James Gunn, our supreme overlord of DC, has graced us with his divine wisdom: *The Batman Part II*…
Another Genius Idea: Jon M. Chu’s Gonna Wreck ‘Hot Wheels’ in Live-Action
Oh, great. Another cinematic masterpiece in the making. 🙄 Jon M. Chu, the visionary behind such groundbreaking films as… *checks…
CNN: Trump and Bibi’s Excellent Iranian Adventure: The Sequel
Oh, CNN, always spinning tales of “stabilization” after President Trump’s *unprecedented* smackdown of Iran. Unprecedented because no other President had…
‘M3GAN 2.0’: More Like ‘MEH-GAN 2.0’ am I Right
Jason Blum, the Nostradamus of cheap thrills and jump scares, has bravely admitted that trying to turn M3GAN into a…
Escape Academy 2: Back 2 School Preview: Get Ready to Question Your Life Choices With More Puzzles & Existential Dread
Okay, so, Summer Game Fest 2025, right? We were promised “unannounced” appointments, which, let’s be honest, is like saying you’re…
Arnold’s Biggest Paycheck: You Won’t Believe This Cinematic Masterpiece (Spoiler: It’s Probably Terrible)
Arnold Schwarzenegger, the guy who single-handedly made biceps cool and explosions even cooler, has been in some cinematic masterpieces. The…
Sherlock Holmes 3: Is This Thing Even Still a Thing? Jared Harris Has Opinions
So, Jared Harris, bless his heart 🙄, apparently has “no clue” what’s going on with the third Sherlock Holmes movie.…
‘Crimson Tide 2: Electric Boogaloo’ Incoming
Oh, sweet Neptune’s beard! 🧜♂️ Jerry Bruckheimer, bless his octogenarian heart, is apparently smoking something stronger than sea kelp and…