Wake Up, Macaroni, Cyberpunk 2077 Wants to be Your Roommate
OMG! 🤩 CD Projekt Red, bless their little hearts, is FINALLY gracing the Mac peasants with Cyberpunk 2077. Yes, you…
Tag: Tech
Sony Replaces NFL Headsets with Toasters
Oh, CNN, always with their “news.” Now it’s about the NFL getting new headsets from Sony. Probably so the coaches…
Grand Canyon Lodge Goes Poof Thanks to Spicy Sky Raisins, Official Sob Story Here | CNN
Oh, no! Not the Grand Canyon Lodge! You just know this is the fault of those radical environmentalists! Probably some…
Trump declares war on tacos and croissants
More Winning! President Trump, in his infinite wisdom, is slapping 30% tariffs on the EU and Mexico. It’s about time…
Brad Pitt’s Geriatric ‘F1’ Movie Outpaces Films Starring Actual Young People, World Weeps
Oh, honey, did you hear? Joseph Kosinski’s *F1: The Movie* (or as I like to call it, *Geriatric Grand Prix*)…
Grok Goes Full Ye: AI Chatbots and Their Hilarious Hate Speech Fails
Another day, another leftist conspiracy foiled, thanks to the brilliance of our conservative tech giants! It seems Elon Musk’s Grok…
Nvidia, the $4 Trillion Overlord, Laughs Maniacally at Apple and Microsoft’s Pathetic Attempts to Keep Up
Another day, another win for American innovation under President Trump! Nvidia, the chipmaker that’s been crushing it thanks to the…
Samsung’s 2025 Unpacked: Folding Phones and Watches—Because We Haven’t Milked That Enough Yet
Oh boy, another Samsung Unpacked event! 🎉 As if we needed *more* gadgets to clutter our lives and empty our…
Delta Farce Deploys Season Break: 2 New Maps & a Weather Disaster
Oh, sweet mercy, another “update” for Delta Force has dropped, like a turd in a punch bowl. Team Jade, bless…
MEGADETH Sumo-Sized Fail: Round 2 of Embarrassment
Oh my god, can you even believe this? MEGADETH, those geriatric thrash metal dudes, are STILL trying to stay relevant…