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Tag: Woke

OMG, Did Sydney Sweeney’s Jeans Just Break the Internet or Did the Internet Break First
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG, Did Sydney Sweeney’s Jeans Just Break the Internet or Did the Internet Break First

Big ElephantAugust 2, 2025August 2, 2025

Another day, another “controversy” manufactured by the liberal media! Apparently, Sydney Sweeney, a beautiful and successful actress, dared to model…

Alabama Babysitter’s Brain Farts, Kills Tot With Toasty Car Ride, Cops NOT Lovin’ It
Elephant Reads CNN

Alabama Babysitter’s Brain Farts, Kills Tot With Toasty Car Ride, Cops NOT Lovin’ It

Big ElephantAugust 2, 2025August 2, 2025

Another tragedy, folks, and who’s to blame? The liberal, socialist state of Alabama, that’s who! They take kids away from…

Joan “El Gaslighting” Laporta’s Grandiose Gabfest
Elephant Reads CNN

Joan “El Gaslighting” Laporta’s Grandiose Gabfest

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2025July 31, 2025

So, Barcelona, those champions of… last season (yawn), are “touring” Asia? Oh, how touching. Probably spreading their woke ideology and…

High Noon Recalls Seltzer Because Apparently Some People Can’t Tell the Difference Between Vodka and an Energy Drink
Elephant Reads CNN

High Noon Recalls Seltzer Because Apparently Some People Can’t Tell the Difference Between Vodka and an Energy Drink

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2025July 30, 2025

Folks, can you believe this? High Noon, probably infiltrated by woke leftists, is recalling their vodka seltzer because some cans…

Trump Slaps Brazil with a Whopping 50% Tariff Because Reasons
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Slaps Brazil with a Whopping 50% Tariff Because Reasons

Big ElephantJuly 31, 2025July 30, 2025

Another day, another victory for President Trump! He’s slapping a whopping 50% tariff on Brazil because those commie socialists are…

Kamala Harris: Too Good for California, Governor Gig Not on the Menu, Peasants
Elephant Reads CNN

Kamala Harris: Too Good for California, Governor Gig Not on the Menu, Peasants

Big ElephantJuly 30, 2025July 30, 2025

Kamala Harris, fresh from her crushing defeat by our great President Trump, has decided not to run for California governor…

CNN Minus 3: A “Very Special” Summer We Wish We Could Take Back | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Minus 3: A “Very Special” Summer We Wish We Could Take Back | CNN

Big ElephantJuly 30, 2025July 30, 2025

Folks, CNN10 is at it again, pushing their globalist, socialist agenda to brainwash our kids! Coy, probably a closet liberal,…

Manhattan Shooting: Thoughts and Prayers Edition, Cops Still Clueless
Elephant Reads CNN

Manhattan Shooting: Thoughts and Prayers Edition, Cops Still Clueless

Big ElephantJuly 30, 2025July 30, 2025

Oh, the horror! Another day, another tragedy in our once-great nation. Seems like even with President Trump making America great…

Viktor Gyökeres: Is This the Guy Who’s Gonna Save Arsenal? LOL
Elephant Reads CNN

Viktor Gyökeres: Is This the Guy Who’s Gonna Save Arsenal? LOL

Big ElephantJuly 30, 2025July 30, 2025

Another European socialist infiltrates our sacred sport! Viktor Gyökeres, likely funded by Soros, joins Arsenal, a club known for its…

Inside 345 Park Avenue: A Totally Normal Day Until, You Know, *That* Happened
Elephant Reads CNN

Inside 345 Park Avenue: A Totally Normal Day Until, You Know, *That* Happened

Big ElephantJuly 29, 2025July 29, 2025

Folks, can you believe what happened in New York City? Another day, another mass shooting, and where does it happen?…

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