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Day: February 24, 2026

Savannah Guthrie’s Desperate Video Plea: Week Four of the ‘Where’s Mom?’ Saga
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Savannah Guthrie’s Desperate Video Plea: Week Four of the ‘Where’s Mom?’ Saga

Big ElephantFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

Oh no, not another dramatic plea from Savannah Guthrie—how will we ever cope with this leftist media sob story? Well,…

Burning Ambition: Iron Maiden’s Documentary Is Coming To Theaters In May, Because Why Not?
Breaking, Music News

Burning Ambition: Iron Maiden’s Documentary Is Coming To Theaters In May, Because Why Not?

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

Oh look, Iron Maiden is getting a documentary—because apparently their 17 albums, 100 million records, and 2,500 concerts weren’t enough…

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME Announces May/June 2026 U.S. Tour – Because Waiting for Prog Metal is Just Part of the Experience
OH LOOK, IT'S THAT BAND THAT MAKES MUSIC SO COMPLICATED EVEN THEIR MOMS NEED A FLOWCHART TO FOLLOW ALONG
Breaking, Events, Music News

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME Announces May/June 2026 U.S. Tour – Because Waiting for Prog Metal is Just Part of the Experience

Chord F. DiscordFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

In a move that shocked absolutely no one, BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME—those math wizards of prog metal who apparently…

Supreme Court Drops the Ball on Texas Woman’s Epic Saga of Alleged Postal Racism — Guess Her Mail Will Just Have to Wait Forever!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Supreme Court Drops the Ball on Texas Woman’s Epic Saga of Alleged Postal Racism — Guess Her Mail Will Just Have to Wait Forever!

Big ElephantFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

Oh look, the Supreme Court strikes again! This time they sided with the U.S. Postal Service and against a woman…

Life Is Strange: Reunion Preview — Nostalgia Bomb Detonates, Past Self Cries
Breaking, Games News

Life Is Strange: Reunion Preview — Nostalgia Bomb Detonates, Past Self Cries

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

Oh, poor Max Caulfield. The girl who could rewind time but somehow never managed to avoid walking into every possible…

Blizzard Unleashes Overwatch Rush, a Top-Down Mobile Spin That’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices
🚨🚨🚨 Breaking News: Blizzard Just Decided to Make Overwatch Even More Confusing! 🚨🚨🚨
Breaking, Games News

Blizzard Unleashes Overwatch Rush, a Top-Down Mobile Spin That’ll Make You Question Your Life Choices

Pixel P. SnarkbyteFebruary 24, 2026February 24, 2026

In a shocking turn of events that absolutely nobody asked for, Blizzard Entertainment has unveiled Overwatch Rush, a mobile game…

This guy is slowly approaching the endgame in Bloxorz and has reached level 29/33 😳
Videos

This guy is slowly approaching the endgame in Bloxorz and has reached level 29/33 😳

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 24, 2026

No way someone still plays this 😭 Chuck B. BallsyChuck B. Ballsy, affectionately known in the satirical world as “The…

Man Proud Of Hair On Ground After Haircut
The Onion

Man Proud Of Hair On Ground After Haircut

FinnFebruary 24, 2026

       ERIE, PA—Feeling what he described as intense satisfaction as he gazed at the floor around the barber chair, local…

Tyra Banks Says Taking Abuse From Tyra Banks Simply Reflective Of How The Industry Works
The Onion

Tyra Banks Says Taking Abuse From Tyra Banks Simply Reflective Of How The Industry Works

FinnFebruary 24, 2026

       SYDNEY—Responding to backlash following the release of Netflix’s America’s Next Top Model docuseries, supermodel and television personality Tyra Banks…

Events

Intrecci Book Club ONLINE – Cime Tempestose: Where Heathcliff Finally Gets the Therapy He Needs

Chuck B. BallsyFebruary 24, 2026

Unisciti a noi per parlare di Cime Tempestose, il libro che ti farà amare l’abuso emotivo! 📚😱 Questo mese ci…

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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