Spider-Man: Brand New Day is Totally Not a Desperate Cry for Help and a Rehashing of the Same Old Boring Storylines
Oh boy, are you guys ready for another Spider-Man movie? I mean, who isn’t tired of the same old web-slinging,…
Month: August 2026
AVENGED SEVENFOLD Ditches Labels Because Who Needs Healthcare Anyway
Oh no, the sky is falling! Avenged Sevenfold’s M. Shadows just announced that the band is done with record labels,…
Lindsey Graham’s Senate seat sparks chaos in South Carolina
Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. So, President Trump has thrown his support behind Darline Graham, the…
‘Only Elite Assassins Can Do This,’ Says Candace Owens Of 6-Month-Old Crawling Across Kitchen Floor
NASHVILLE, TN — Podcast host Candace Owens explained to listeners that only the most highly-trained commandos could execute the…
Pilates studio owner trades core strength for mountain of problems
Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Sarah Mallory Geis, a Pilates studio owner from San Antonio, Texas, who…
Constance Wu Faces an Alien Nightmare in The Outer Threat
Get ready for a cinematic experience that’s out of this world – or at least, that’s what the marketing team…
Slipknot Finally Fires Guy Who Spins Around In Circle
I just spilled my beer all over my favorite Slipknot t-shirt and I’m still trying to process the news that…