WASHINGTON—Admitting that his prior beliefs regarding conflagrations had been formed out of ignorance, longtime U.S. Forest Service icon Smokey Bear issued a statement Monday claiming that his views on wildfires had evolved. “You have to understand, when I was coming up in the ’40s, these fires were talked about in an almost entirely negative context, and I was just a dumb cub echoing the conventional thinking of the time,” said Smokey Bear, telling reporters that conversations with real estate owners and insurance carriers who had benefited from wildfires had convinced him to soften his stance. “I’ve always striven to live with integrity, and sometimes that means admitting that you were wrong. It’s clear to me now that the decimation of large sections of woodland by an out-of-control blaze is a far more nuanced issue than I had previously been led to believe. While I don’t think I’m ever going to be cheering on flaming infernos spreading throughout our nation’s parks, I now understand they have an important role to play in a healthy ecosystem.” Smokey Bear added that he would be joining fellow mascot McGruff The Crime Dog to petition Congress for more lenient penalties against arsonists.
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WASHINGTON—Admitting that his prior beliefs regarding conflagrations had been formed out of ignorance, longtime U.S. Forest Service icon Smokey Bear issued a statement Monday claiming that his views on wildfires had evolved. “You have to understand, when I was coming up in the ’40s, these fires were talked about in an almost entirely negative context,
The post Smokey Bear Claims Views On Wildfires Have Evolved appeared first on The Onion. Read More
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed “Emperor of Irony,” started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
