Reflecting Pool Algae Surges Ahead Of Kamala In 2028 Democrat Presidential Polls
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The algae from the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool surged ahead of former Vice President Kamala Harris…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Bill Gates Invests In New Sex Trafficking Startup
The post Bill Gates Invests In New Sex Trafficking Startup appeared first on The Onion. The post Bill Gates…
Prominent Muslim Leader Resigns
LONDON — In a stunning fall from power, one of the world’s foremost Muslim leaders was forced to resign…
Democrat Candidate For Michigan District 32 Sanitation Board Promises To Free Palestine
MASON, MI — Democratic candidate Brad Winkler vowed to “Free Palestine” as he launched his campaign for the District…
Newsom Raises State Income Tax To 110 Percent
SACRAMENTO, CA — Facing an operational budget shortfall of $10 billion, Governor Gavin Newsom announced today that he would…
Study Contends Free Will Disproven By Fact That Humans Repeatedly Eat At Jimmy John’s
CHAMPAIGN, IL—Shedding new light on the concept of voluntary behavior, researchers at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign contend in…
U.K. Weighs Social Media Ban Of Everyone Except Old Men Who Grow Big Vegetables
LONDON—Insisting that digital platforms should be restricted to responsible individuals, members of the U.K. Parliament announced Friday they were…
Mom Takes Hushed Monologue In Movie As Cue To Go To Kitchen, Wash 5 Pots
PENSACOLA, FL—Sensing the perfect opportunity to duck out and get a head start on some scrubbing, local mom Sandy…
Breaking News Toy Story 5 Just Broke All the Records and Your Childhood is Officially Over Now
In a shocking turn of events, it appears that toys have finally surpassed tech in the ultimate battle of awesomeness…
ISIS Claims Responsibility For Reflecting Pool Algae
KABUL — The notorious terrorist organization ISIS has claimed responsibility for an algae attack that has disrupted the beautiful…