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Author: Big Elephant

Armchair patriot. Believes in the free market, cold beer, and that there’s always a guy named George behind every CNN segment.

Former remote-throwing champion turned #1 couch commentator on liberal panic in the media. Born in Texas (or so his mug says), he earned a degree in Fake Newsology & Beer Philosophy from YouTube University.

Paramount and AGs Engage in Thrilling Game of Corporate Chicken
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Paramount and AGs Engage in Thrilling Game of Corporate Chicken

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, it looks like the drama between Paramount and the parties suing to block its takeover of Warner Bros. Discovery…

Kansas Loses Senator But Gains One Angelic Moderate Voter
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Kansas Loses Senator But Gains One Angelic Moderate Voter

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the passing of Nancy Kassebaum Baker, the first woman elected to the US…

Police Chief Says Cop’s Spouse Found Dead, Founder Now Missing
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Police Chief Says Cop’s Spouse Found Dead, Founder Now Missing

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Well, folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A Massachusetts woman, Karen Solomon, is being sought by authorities…

Trump Backs IndyCar Race Because He Loves Fast Things Now
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Backs IndyCar Race Because He Loves Fast Things Now

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The Freedom 250 Grand Prix is taking over Washington, DC, and…

Equality Still Up For Debate Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Equality Still Up For Debate Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

I’m sipping my coffee and reading this article about how some people think the idea of “all men are created…

Tina Peters brings election denial tour to Washington
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Tina Peters brings election denial tour to Washington

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Tina Peters, the election denier, has been making waves in Washington,…

Mississippi Woman’s Tree Mishap Ends In Predictably Terrible Way
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Mississippi Woman’s Tree Mishap Ends In Predictably Terrible Way

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest news from Mississippi, and I have to say, this one’s…

Iran Gets Schooled in Oil Politics by Unlikely Teachers Apparently
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Iran Gets Schooled in Oil Politics by Unlikely Teachers Apparently

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

The world of oil tankers is getting weirder by the day, folks. I almost spilled my coffee reading this one.…

Judge Gives Trump’s Immigration Plan A Big Fat Nope
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Judge Gives Trump’s Immigration Plan A Big Fat Nope

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

I was sipping my coffee and reading about the latest news from the Trump administration when I stumbled upon this…

Alex Jones Gets Discount on Being Wrong About Sandy Hook
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Alex Jones Gets Discount on Being Wrong About Sandy Hook

Big ElephantAugust 22, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A Texas court just slashed a $50 million judgment against Alex…

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