Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Advertisment Image
  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
    • The Jackal Index
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Russians suddenly remember Kyiv is still a thing
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Russians suddenly remember Kyiv is still a thing

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and trying to wrap my head around this mess in Ukraine. Russia is still pounding…

America turns 247 and nobody cares
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

America turns 247 and nobody cares

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. The United States is turning 250, and it seems like nobody’s…

You Won’t Believe Who’s Cashing In On America’s Birthday
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Won’t Believe Who’s Cashing In On America’s Birthday

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A report from House Democrats claims that donors who thought they…

Texas Kid Tragedies Linked In Crazy Coincidence
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Texas Kid Tragedies Linked In Crazy Coincidence

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

This article is a real heart-wrencher, folks. I almost spilled my coffee reading about the two deadliest child tragedies in…

Can’t miss this: Trump’s cash, heatwaves, and oh Venezuela drama
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Can’t miss this: Trump’s cash, heatwaves, and oh Venezuela drama

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. Let’s dive into the latest news. The Supreme Court has wrapped…

UAE Eats Again Who Knew
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

UAE Eats Again Who Knew

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the United Arab Emirates’ restaurant market, and let me tell you, it’s…

You Won’t Believe These 9 Senate Seats Are Toast
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Won’t Believe These 9 Senate Seats Are Toast

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Well, folks, it looks like the battle for the US Senate is heating up. Four months into the primary calendar,…

Colorado Gov axes board members who dissed Tina Peters’ sweet deal
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Colorado Gov axes board members who dissed Tina Peters’ sweet deal

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about the latest drama in Colorado, where Governor Jared Polis just fired two…

Swift and Kelce take over MSG wow what a dream team
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Swift and Kelce take over MSG wow what a dream team

Big ElephantJuly 2, 2026

So, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Taylor Swift’s super-secret wedding plans, and I have to say, it’s quite…

You Won’t Believe What’s Killing The Dems Now
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

You Won’t Believe What’s Killing The Dems Now

Big ElephantJuly 1, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Stephen A. Smith’s latest take on socialism, and I’ve got to say,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 9 10 11 … 303 Next

Latest posts

  • Charles Barkley Ditches Taylor Swifts Wedding for Golf
  • The Sopranos: Because You Clearly Have Nothing Better to Do with Your Life Than Watch a Bunch of Old Mafia Guys Whine About Their Feelings in Glorious 4K Ultra HD
  • Taylor Momsen Trades Rock Cred For Coffee Shop Gig At Amoeba Records
  • Harold And Kumar Reunion Film Gains Momentum
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Judge denies New York Times bid to move Trump defamation lawsuit

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
July 2026
S M T W T F S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Jun    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.
Manage Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}