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Category: Elephant Reads CNN

Savannah Guthrie ‘plans to return’ to the ‘Today’ show, NBC says
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Savannah Guthrie ‘plans to return’ to the ‘Today’ show, NBC says

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026

Oh, Look! Savannah Guthrie “Plans to Return” to Today Show—Because Apparently, Searching for Her Missing Mom Was Just a Coffee…

3 Women Found Dead in Utah Sparks Manhunt, Chaos, and Everyone Freaking Out Like It’s the End of Days
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

3 Women Found Dead in Utah Sparks Manhunt, Chaos, and Everyone Freaking Out Like It’s the End of Days

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Yet Another “Hiker Found Dead” Story, But Wait, There’s More! Well, well, well, look who decided to go hiking in…

What to Expect in Friday’s Jobs Report: A Comedy of Economic Errors | CNN Business
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

What to Expect in Friday’s Jobs Report: A Comedy of Economic Errors | CNN Business

Big ElephantMarch 5, 2026March 5, 2026

Another Trump Economic “Win” – Small Businesses Struggle as Trade Wars Backfire Small businesses across America are reportedly struggling to…

Border Patrol Checkpoint Chase Ends in Texas with Suspect Getting a One-Way Ticket to the Afterlife, Officials Report
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Border Patrol Checkpoint Chase Ends in Texas with Suspect Getting a One-Way Ticket to the Afterlife, Officials Report

Big ElephantMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Breaking: Another Liberal Triggered Snowflake Meets His Match at the Border! In a shocking turn of events that will no…

Two Tiny Travelers Found in Luggage: Cleveland’s Latest Overbooked Adventure
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Two Tiny Travelers Found in Luggage: Cleveland’s Latest Overbooked Adventure

Big ElephantMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Cleveland’s ‘Surprise Suitcases’ – Another Mystery the FBI Is Probably Too Busy With to Solve Well folks, it’s another fine…

US Submarine Sinks Iranian Warship in International Waters, Breaking WWII Silence Like a Boss
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Submarine Sinks Iranian Warship in International Waters, Breaking WWII Silence Like a Boss

Big ElephantMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Libtards Shaking as Trump’s Sub Torpedoes Iranian Ship! So, here we go again! The Deep State’s favorite puppet, Pete Hegseth,…

US Air Defenses: Not So Good at Catching Iran’s One-Way Drone Party Favors
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

US Air Defenses: Not So Good at Catching Iran’s One-Way Drone Party Favors

Big ElephantMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Oh no, the poor Iranian drone operators! Their Shahed attack drones—which are basically flying lawn mowers with bombs strapped to…

Democrats in Texas Go Wild, Shatter Turnout Records Like It’s a Black Friday Sale
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Democrats in Texas Go Wild, Shatter Turnout Records Like It’s a Black Friday Sale

Big ElephantMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Wow, the Democrats are super excited about losing again! In Texas, a whopping 2.2 million voters showed up to watch…

Hegseth Confirms Iranian Warship’s New Career as an Underwater Reef
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Hegseth Confirms Iranian Warship’s New Career as an Underwater Reef

Big ElephantMarch 4, 2026March 4, 2026

Breaking: Submarine Does What It Was Built For, Iranian Warship Disappears — In a shocking display of naval competence, Defense…

Israel launches epic ‘broad wave’ of strikes on Iran; retired U.S Gen. Hertling spills tea on what’s next!
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Israel launches epic ‘broad wave’ of strikes on Iran; retired U.S Gen. Hertling spills tea on what’s next!

Big ElephantMarch 3, 2026March 3, 2026

Israel Strikes Back, Liberals Cry About “Peace” While Iran Gets What It Deserves In a shocking twist of events, Israel…

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