Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Category: Movie News

The Bear Gets Another Season: Disney+ Milking It For All It’s Worth
Breaking, Movie News

The Bear Gets Another Season: Disney+ Milking It For All It’s Worth

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 2, 2025July 2, 2025

Oh, sweet baby Carmy! 🐻🔪 FX just HAD to announce that The Bear is getting a fifth season. Like we…

Denis Villeneuve Directing Bond? More Like Bore-is Villeneuve
Breaking, Movie News

Denis Villeneuve Directing Bond? More Like Bore-is Villeneuve

FinnJuly 2, 2025July 2, 2025

OMG! 😱 Denis Villeneuve, the guy who made sand look interesting for 3 hours, is directing the new James Bond…

‘Jurassic World Rebirth’: Dinosaurs Did WHAT Now?!
Breaking, Movie News

‘Jurassic World Rebirth’: Dinosaurs Did WHAT Now?!

FinnJune 30, 2025June 30, 2025

Opening in theaters on July 2nd is 🦖‘Jurassic World Rebirth’, the latest in the long-running dinosaur franchise that originated with…

Dave Bautista Volunteered as Tribute for ‘Road House’ Redo
Breaking, Movie News

Dave Bautista Volunteered as Tribute for ‘Road House’ Redo

FinnJune 30, 2025June 30, 2025

Oh, honey, guess what? 💅 They’re making another ‘Road House’ movie! 🙄 Because the first one was just *so* good,…

Squid Game Season 3: More Like Squid *Lame*, amirite
Breaking, Movie News

Squid Game Season 3: More Like Squid *Lame*, amirite

FinnJune 29, 2025June 29, 2025

Released on Netflix on June 27th, ‘Squid Game’ Season 3, because apparently two seasons weren’t enough, represents the final *alleged*…

28 Years Later: More Like 28 Years Wasted, Am I Right
Breaking, Movie News

28 Years Later: More Like 28 Years Wasted, Am I Right

FinnJune 27, 2025June 27, 2025

Oh, honey, let’s talk about ’28 Years Later’ and its *totally* unpredictable ending that NO ONE saw coming. 🙄 If…

Owen Wilson’s Nose Dives Back Into the ‘Meet The Parents’ Dumpster Fire
Breaking, Movie News

Owen Wilson’s Nose Dives Back Into the ‘Meet The Parents’ Dumpster Fire

FinnJune 27, 2025June 27, 2025

Oh, sweet merciful crap, they’re doing another ‘Meet the Parents’ movie? 🙄 Is nothing sacred anymore? Are we really scraping…

Jake Gyllenhaal Considers Endorsing Scrubs Commercial
Breaking, Movie News

Jake Gyllenhaal Considers Endorsing Scrubs Commercial

FinnJune 27, 2025June 27, 2025

**Oh, look, it’s Jake Gyllenhaal, still trying to be relevant! 🙄 Apparently, after failing to impress anyone with his “acting”…

James Bond Rides a Sandworm: Denis Villeneuve Merges Dune with 007
New Bond Movie Has Spice, Sandworms, and Zero F***s Given
Movie News

James Bond Rides a Sandworm: Denis Villeneuve Merges Dune with 007

FinnJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

🎬 “Sand, Spice, and Shaken Martinis” — that’s how you can now describe the future of the James Bond franchise.…

Kate Bush’s “Little Shrew” to Invade Cinemas: Prepare for Rodent Mania
Breaking, Movie News

Kate Bush’s “Little Shrew” to Invade Cinemas: Prepare for Rodent Mania

Chord F. DiscordJune 26, 2025June 26, 2025

Oh great, another Kate Bush short film. 🙄Little Shrew, written and directed by the one and only Kate Bush (yes,…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 90 91 92 … 101 Next

Latest posts

  • Rip Current Interrupted By Unscheduled Act Of Heroism
  • Nevada Governor Declares Emergency Because Hawk Fire Refuses to Chill
  • THE ORACLE SPEAKS: DJT blasts Canada over tariffs and statehood demands
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Mark Levin claims blue states are sabotaging citizens nationwide
  • Karmelo Anthony Not Getting Do-Over In Murder Case

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.