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Category: Breaking

Tom Holland Claims ‘Spider-Man 4’ Will Be So ‘Old School’ It’ll Be in Black & White With Cardboard Webshooters
Breaking, Movie News

Tom Holland Claims ‘Spider-Man 4’ Will Be So ‘Old School’ It’ll Be in Black & White With Cardboard Webshooters

FinnJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Oh great, another Spider-Man movie 🙄. As if we needed more of Tom Holland in spandex, desperately trying to convince…

Rian Johnson Spills the Tea: ‘Knives Out 3’ to Be Even More Extra With “Gothic” Vibes
Breaking, Movie News

Rian Johnson Spills the Tea: ‘Knives Out 3’ to Be Even More Extra With “Gothic” Vibes

FinnJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Finally, some good news! Rian Johnson, the guy who RUINED Star Wars (yeah, I said it 😤), says the next…

Aaron Stainthorpe’s Epic Emo Exit From My Dying Bride: Guitarist Throws Shade
Breaking, Music News

Aaron Stainthorpe’s Epic Emo Exit From My Dying Bride: Guitarist Throws Shade

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

In a groundbreaking interview with Metalirium (because who ELSE would care? 😂), MY DYING BRIDE guitarist Andrew Craighan spilled the…

Another Hollywood Nepo Baby Sounds Off on Superman Casting, As If We Care
Breaking, Movie News

Another Hollywood Nepo Baby Sounds Off on Superman Casting, As If We Care

FinnJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Oh, dear Lord, another Superman movie? 🙄 Is there really nothing else Hollywood can come up with? Will Reeve, son…

Wake Up, Macaroni, Cyberpunk 2077 Wants to be Your Roommate
Breaking, Games News

Wake Up, Macaroni, Cyberpunk 2077 Wants to be Your Roommate

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

OMG! 🤩 CD Projekt Red, bless their little hearts, is FINALLY gracing the Mac peasants with Cyberpunk 2077. Yes, you…

KISS Milks ‘Alive!’ For 50th Time: Prepare For More Unnecessary Reissues
Breaking, Music News

KISS Milks ‘Alive!’ For 50th Time: Prepare For More Unnecessary Reissues

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

🤪OMG!🚨 Get ready to open your wallets, KISS Army (and your gullible parents)!🤑 Apparently, some old dude named Eddie Kramer…

“Bestest” Game Deals (You Won’t Believe!) and How We Get Rich Off Your Addiction
Breaking, Games News

“Bestest” Game Deals (You Won’t Believe!) and How We Get Rich Off Your Addiction

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Ah, yes, the glorious world of digital game deals, where your dreams of becoming a digital hoarder come true! 🤑…

Amon Amarth to Drop New Ditty ‘We Rule the Waves’ on Hump Day, Prepare to Be Mildly Titillated
Breaking, Music News

Amon Amarth to Drop New Ditty ‘We Rule the Waves’ on Hump Day, Prepare to Be Mildly Titillated

Chord F. DiscordJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

So, the Vikings who can’t seem to find a new gimmick AMON AMARTH are gracing us with a single and…

In-Game Transactions: Pro Tips to Empty Your Wallet Faster, Noob
Breaking, Games News

In-Game Transactions: Pro Tips to Empty Your Wallet Faster, Noob

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

Ah, yes, in-game transactions. Because who doesn’t love parting with their hard-earned cash for a digital hat? 🎩 Whether you’re…

EA Sports FC 26: Zlatan’s Face So Good, It Leaked Before the Trailer Even Breathed
Breaking, Games News

EA Sports FC 26: Zlatan’s Face So Good, It Leaked Before the Trailer Even Breathed

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

EA has announced that Swedish demigod Zlatan Ibrahimović, the only human to ever bench press a planet, will be the…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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