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Tag: breaking

Games Done Quick Somehow Manages To Not Fall Asleep At gamescom 2026 While Watching Speedrunners Play The Same Old Games For The Millionth Time
Breaking, Games News

Games Done Quick Somehow Manages To Not Fall Asleep At gamescom 2026 While Watching Speedrunners Play The Same Old Games For The Millionth Time

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 3, 2026May 3, 2026

Big news, gamers! πŸš¨πŸ‘€ Games Done Quick is finally coming to gamescom in Germany, because who doesn’t love a good…

Ex METALLICA Bassist JASON NEWSTED Finally Finds Something More Painful Than Listening To LULU
Breaking, Music News

Ex METALLICA Bassist JASON NEWSTED Finally Finds Something More Painful Than Listening To LULU

Chord F. DiscordMay 3, 2026May 3, 2026

Breaking news, folks! 🚨😱 Former METALLICA bassist Jason Newsted has just announced that he’s been battling throat cancer, and we’re…

Breaking News: Super Extra Special Never Before Seen Totally Not Made Up 5 Hour Directors Cut of Gremlins Accidentally Leaks and Its 3 Hours Longer Than That Other Thing You Saw
Breaking, Movie News

Breaking News: Super Extra Special Never Before Seen Totally Not Made Up 5 Hour Directors Cut of Gremlins Accidentally Leaks and Its 3 Hours Longer Than That Other Thing You Saw

FinnMay 3, 2026May 3, 2026

The secret’s out, folks! 🀫 A never-before-seen, 2-and-a-half-hour cut of Gremlins, yes, you read that right, 2.5 hours of gremlin…

Breaking News: Slayer’s Tom Araya Trades In His Mic For A Checkered Flag And Is Now Officially The Coolest Guy At The WΓΌrth 400 In Texas Because Who Needs To Headbang When You Can Rev Engines
Breaking, Music News

Breaking News: Slayer’s Tom Araya Trades In His Mic For A Checkered Flag And Is Now Officially The Coolest Guy At The WΓΌrth 400 In Texas Because Who Needs To Headbang When You Can Rev Engines

Chord F. DiscordMay 3, 2026May 3, 2026

Big news, folks! πŸš¨πŸ‘€ Tom Araya, the legendary lead vocalist and bassist of the iconic thrash metal band SLAYER, has…

Greta Gerwig’s ‘Narnia’ Because You Clearly Weren’t Bored Enough Already Gets Delayed to 2027
Breaking, Movie News

Greta Gerwig’s ‘Narnia’ Because You Clearly Weren’t Bored Enough Already Gets Delayed to 2027

FinnMay 2, 2026May 2, 2026

Oh boy, get ready for the most epic news ever! πŸŽ‰ Greta Gerwig’s follow-up to Barbie is going to take…

MagicCon Las Vegas 2026: Where Middle Earth Meets Midlife Crisis and the Only Reality Fracture is Your Sanity After Waiting in Line for the Bathroom
Breaking, Events

MagicCon Las Vegas 2026: Where Middle Earth Meets Midlife Crisis and the Only Reality Fracture is Your Sanity After Waiting in Line for the Bathroom

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 2, 2026May 2, 2026

Get ready for the most epic MagicCon Las Vegas ever! πŸŽ‰πŸ‘ Wizards of the Coast just dropped a ton of…

Breaking News ANGRA Finally Figures Out How to Use Zoom and Reunites with KIKO LOUREIRO EDU FALASCHI and AQUILES PRIESTER at 2026 BANGERS OPEN AIR Because Who Needs a Recording Studio When You Have WiFi
Breaking, Music News

Breaking News ANGRA Finally Figures Out How to Use Zoom and Reunites with KIKO LOUREIRO EDU FALASCHI and AQUILES PRIESTER at 2026 BANGERS OPEN AIR Because Who Needs a Recording Studio When You Have WiFi

Chord F. DiscordMay 2, 2026May 2, 2026

So, you want to know about the epic reunion of Angra’s “Rebirth” lineup at the 2026 Bangers Open Air festival?…

Fortnite is Basically Going to Ruin Star Wars with a Cringeworthy Galaxy of Overhyped Content and a Darth Vader Game That Will Probably Give You Nightmares of His Breathing
Breaking, Games News

Fortnite is Basically Going to Ruin Star Wars with a Cringeworthy Galaxy of Overhyped Content and a Darth Vader Game That Will Probably Give You Nightmares of His Breathing

Pixel P. SnarkbyteMay 1, 2026May 1, 2026

Get ready for the most epic collaboration in gaming history: Fortnite is about to get a massive injection of Star…

I Clearly Have Nothing Better to Do with My Life So I Decided to Drink the Nastiest Thing in the Galaxy aka Star Wars Blue Milk
Breaking, Movie News

I Clearly Have Nothing Better to Do with My Life So I Decided to Drink the Nastiest Thing in the Galaxy aka Star Wars Blue Milk

FinnMay 1, 2026May 1, 2026

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away… πŸš€πŸ‘½ a man named George Lucas created a film called…

ROG Xbox Ally Finally Decides to Show Up Fashionably Late with a Bunch of Updates That Will Probably Break Something Else
Breaking, Games News

ROG Xbox Ally Finally Decides to Show Up Fashionably Late with a Bunch of Updates That Will Probably Break Something Else

Pixel P. SnarkbyteApril 30, 2026April 30, 2026

The ROG Xbox Ally is getting a new set of updates, because who doesn’t love a good update, am I…

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Latest posts

  • ARCHITECTS Singer SAM CARTER Reveals The Most Metal Thing That’s Ever Happened To Him: METALLICA’s JAMES HETFIELD Brought Them A Cake And Didn’t Even Smash It
  • SBC Approves Use Of Tasers On Any Visitor Who Tries To Slip Past Greeters
  • When your parents ask what kind of music you listen to
  • Enhanced Games Allows Competing Athletes To Use Steroids
  • Woman Worried She In Codependent Relationship With Rest Of HumanityΒ 

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Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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