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Tag: Disney

5 Things You NEED to Know on July 28th (Or the World Might Explode)
Elephant Reads CNN

5 Things You NEED to Know on July 28th (Or the World Might Explode)

Big ElephantJuly 28, 2025July 28, 2025

Well, folks, another day, another desperate attempt by the liberal media to undermine our GREAT President Trump! First up, a…

Air Dud: Golden Receiver? More Like Golden Retriever-ing This Tired Franchise From the Dog House
Breaking, Movie News

Air Dud: Golden Receiver? More Like Golden Retriever-ing This Tired Franchise From the Dog House

FinnJuly 24, 2025July 24, 2025

Oh, sweet suffering cinephiles, brace yourselves! ๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ• The cinematic masterpiece that none of us asked for, *Air Bud Returns*, is…

gamescom 2025: Prepare for Disappointment โ€” Bigger Than Ever, Apparently
Breaking, Games News

gamescom 2025: Prepare for Disappointment โ€” Bigger Than Ever, Apparently

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 19, 2025July 19, 2025

Oh, sweet gamers, brace yourselves! ๐Ÿคช Gamescom 2025, that annual pilgrimage to the land of overpriced energy drinks and questionable…

CNN Asks: July 18th – Is DOGE Dead Yet? Plus, Other Stuff You Won’t Care About
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN Asks: July 18th – Is DOGE Dead Yet? Plus, Other Stuff You Won’t Care About

Big ElephantJuly 18, 2025July 18, 2025

The radical left strikes again! The Trump administration, in its infinite wisdom, has ended the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifelineโ€™s…

OMG! Johnny Cage is Back in ‘Mortal Kombat II’? Get Ready for Awkward One-Liners and Epic Cringe
Elephant Reads CNN

OMG! Johnny Cage is Back in ‘Mortal Kombat II’? Get Ready for Awkward One-Liners and Epic Cringe

Big ElephantJuly 18, 2025July 18, 2025

Hollywood continues its descent into woke madness! Karl Urban in ‘Mortal Kombat II’? Probably teaching those impressionable youngsters about the…

Nine Inch Nails’ New “Tron” Soundtrack: Get Ready for Some Seriously Overproduced Synth Noises
Breaking, Movie News, Music News

Nine Inch Nails’ New “Tron” Soundtrack: Get Ready for Some Seriously Overproduced Synth Noises

Chord F. DiscordJuly 17, 2025July 17, 2025

“Tron: Ares (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack),” featuring all original music by NINE INCH NAILS (because who else would Disney hire?…

โ€˜The Legend of Zeldaโ€™ Casts Actors Who Will Probably Ruin Your Childhood
Breaking, Movie News

โ€˜The Legend of Zeldaโ€™ Casts Actors Who Will Probably Ruin Your Childhood

FinnJuly 16, 2025July 16, 2025

  OMG!๐Ÿ˜ฑ The live-action Legend of Zelda is officially happening! But like, is it REALLY a step closer to reality,…

Tom Holland Claims ‘Spider-Man 4’ Will Be So ‘Old School’ It’ll Be in Black & White With Cardboard Webshooters
Breaking, Movie News

Tom Holland Claims ‘Spider-Man 4’ Will Be So ‘Old School’ It’ll Be in Black & White With Cardboard Webshooters

FinnJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Oh great, another Spider-Man movie ๐Ÿ™„. As if we needed more of Tom Holland in spandex, desperately trying to convince…

Disney’s Bringing Back Walt as a Robot Overlord, Prepare for the Mouse-pocalypse
Live

Disney’s Bringing Back Walt as a Robot Overlord, Prepare for the Mouse-pocalypse

FinnJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

OMG! ๐Ÿ˜ฒ After, like, a million years (okay, 60), Walt Disney is STILL haunting Disneyland! ๐Ÿ‘ป I mean, his face…

‘Wicked: For Good’ Should Embrace the Book Ending (Because Chaos is Hilarious)
Breaking, Movie News

‘Wicked: For Good’ Should Embrace the Book Ending (Because Chaos is Hilarious)

FinnJuly 13, 2025July 13, 2025

Oh honey, HOLD๐Ÿ‘UP๐Ÿ‘. You think this article is about *preferences*? Please. It’s about demanding Hollywood FINALLY gets something right. I…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Todayโ€™s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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