Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: epic

Aaron Stainthorpe’s Epic Emo Exit From My Dying Bride: Guitarist Throws Shade
Breaking, Music News

Aaron Stainthorpe’s Epic Emo Exit From My Dying Bride: Guitarist Throws Shade

Chord F. DiscordJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

In a groundbreaking interview with Metalirium (because who ELSE would care? 😂), MY DYING BRIDE guitarist Andrew Craighan spilled the…

Wake Up, Macaroni, Cyberpunk 2077 Wants to be Your Roommate
Breaking, Games News

Wake Up, Macaroni, Cyberpunk 2077 Wants to be Your Roommate

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

OMG! 🤩 CD Projekt Red, bless their little hearts, is FINALLY gracing the Mac peasants with Cyberpunk 2077. Yes, you…

“Bestest” Game Deals (You Won’t Believe!) and How We Get Rich Off Your Addiction
Breaking, Games News

“Bestest” Game Deals (You Won’t Believe!) and How We Get Rich Off Your Addiction

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 15, 2025July 15, 2025

Ah, yes, the glorious world of digital game deals, where your dreams of becoming a digital hoarder come true! 🤑…

Amon Amarth to Drop New Ditty ‘We Rule the Waves’ on Hump Day, Prepare to Be Mildly Titillated
Breaking, Music News

Amon Amarth to Drop New Ditty ‘We Rule the Waves’ on Hump Day, Prepare to Be Mildly Titillated

Chord F. DiscordJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

So, the Vikings who can’t seem to find a new gimmick AMON AMARTH are gracing us with a single and…

Ex-Slipknot Drummer Jay Weinberg’s Solo Album: Prepare for the Most Mediocre Undertaking You’ll Ever Be Mildly Interested In
Breaking, Music News

Ex-Slipknot Drummer Jay Weinberg’s Solo Album: Prepare for the Most Mediocre Undertaking You’ll Ever Be Mildly Interested In

Chord F. DiscordJuly 14, 2025July 14, 2025

Wow, look at this “exclusive” interview 🙄 with the guy who got the boot from SLIPKNOT, now slumming it in…

FILTER Dumps ‘All The Good’ Single From Upcoming ‘The Algorithm: Ultra Yawn’
Breaking, Music News

FILTER Dumps ‘All The Good’ Single From Upcoming ‘The Algorithm: Ultra Yawn’

Chord F. DiscordJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

🤣OMG! Platinum-selling, (allegedly) post-industrial/alternative rock pioneers FILTER (who?) are gracing us with their remixed and remastered NEW album, “The Algorithm:…

Witness the Unholy Alliance: Joey Belladonna of Anthrax Abandons Ship to Sing Journey’s ‘Separate Ways’ with DAUGHTRY in the Heart of Syracuse
Breaking

Witness the Unholy Alliance: Joey Belladonna of Anthrax Abandons Ship to Sing Journey’s ‘Separate Ways’ with DAUGHTRY in the Heart of Syracuse

Chord F. DiscordJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

OMG! 😱😱😱 Did you hear? ANTHRAX’s (yes, THAT Anthrax, the thrash metal gods…or whatever) singer Joey Belladonna, bless his heart,…

ELO Cancels ‘Final’ Concert AGAIN, Guess Jeff Lynne Found Another Reason to Dodge Fans
Breaking

ELO Cancels ‘Final’ Concert AGAIN, Guess Jeff Lynne Found Another Reason to Dodge Fans

Chord F. DiscordJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Jeff Lynne’s ELO (a.k.a. the ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA, or as I like to call them, “Barely Functional Octogenarians”) has pulled…

CNN: Trump’s Epic Fail Assassination Attempt Still Echoing Through the Ages
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN: Trump’s Epic Fail Assassination Attempt Still Echoing Through the Ages

Big ElephantJuly 12, 2025July 12, 2025

Another year, another foiled attempt by the Deep State to take down our glorious President Trump! Salena Zito’s new book…

Joey Belladonna Done Belting for Anthrax’s Album (Finally!), Claims to Be “Really Happy,” World Remains Skeptical
Breaking, Music News

Joey Belladonna Done Belting for Anthrax’s Album (Finally!), Claims to Be “Really Happy,” World Remains Skeptical

Chord F. DiscordJuly 11, 2025July 11, 2025

Oh, look, Joey Belladonna is still yapping about that mythical ANTHRAX album. 🙄 In a recent interview with Chicago’s Rebel…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 58 59 60 … 62 Next

Latest posts

  • TRUTH SOCIAL DISPATCH: Trump claims war on fentanyl cuts deaths by over 10000
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump plots crushing economic blockade against Iran
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Chris Garten to lead Indiana Senate chamber
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: NSA withheld election threat reports due to Trump deep state label
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Swalwell got donations from suspected Chinese spy memos reveal

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.