Brendan Banfield Expected to Testify in His Own Defense Because the Defense Rested and the Jury Looked Bored
FAIRFAX, VA – In a courtroom drama straight out of a Netflix series produced by a DEI committee, the trial…
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CD Projekt Red Slaps The Shit Out Of The Only Person Still Playing Cyberpunk 2077, Modder Cries In VR
🎮 Oh No, Not Again! The Great VR Modder Meltdown of 2026 🎮 Hold onto your headsets, folks, because the…
Trump and Vance Discover ICE ‘Oopsies’ After Facing Actual Consequences
Tired of Winning? Trump and Vance Suddenly Discover “Mistakes” as ICE Poll Numbers Crash Faster Than a Biden Stimulus Check!…
Pelosi Privately Blasts Democrats for Daring to Hold the Saintly Clintons Contemptible in Epstein Probe | CNN Politics
Pelosi in Panic Mode as Democrats Turn on the Clinton Crime Family! It’s a beautiful day in President Trump’s second…
The Oscars Nominations Have Officially Been Released, and the Academy Definitely Did Not Just Google “Famous Actors” This Year
🛑 BREAKING: The Oscars Gave Out Nominations Like Candy at a Diabetes Parade 🍬 Ladies, gentlemen, and confused people trying…
He-Man Flexes His Barely-Contained Pecs in a Nostalgia Grab So Desperate Even Skeletor Feels Bad for Him
Oh goodie, another cinematic universe! Because what we truly, desperately needed in the year of our Lord 2024 was a…
Unauthorized Wayne Static Doc Funded by Matt Zane Because Dead Guys Can’t Sue
Well, well, well, grab your popcorn and your hazmat suits, because the unauthorized documentary drama of the decade is back…
STONE SOUR guitarist JOSH RAND’s THE L.I.F.E. PROJECT promises you a full-length album… right after the heat death of the universe in 2026
In the thunderous, eternal battle against the ever-looming threat of having actual release dates, THE L.I.F.E. PROJECT has emerged victorious…
EXODUS Finds Brand New, Unheard-of Way to Write Riffs, Names Band After a Big Guy
Hold onto your studded leather jackets and prepare your necks for the ultimate whiplash, because the thrash titans known as…
Heel – Watch Stephen Graham and Andrea Riseborough in a twisted thriller that’s clearly just *The Wire* meets *The Twilight Zone* but darker because why not
Oh, look! Another “twisted thriller” where a troubled youth gets kidnapped by a family who’s definitely auditioning for the world’s…