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So, You Wanna Watch More Aliens, Huh, Nerd
Breaking, Movie News

So, You Wanna Watch More Aliens, Huh, Nerd

FinnAugust 11, 2025August 12, 2025

Prepare your popcorn, butter that stuff UP, and settle in, buttercups, because Alien: Earth is about to grace our screens,…

US Officials Throw a Hissy Fit Trying to Plan Trump-Putin Lovefest
Elephant Reads CNN

US Officials Throw a Hissy Fit Trying to Plan Trump-Putin Lovefest

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Oh, boy, here we go again! The Fake News CNN is hyperventilating about President Trump meeting with Putin in Alaska.…

Trump Promises 1,500% Drug Price Cuts: Reality Bites (Like a $5,000 Pill)
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump Promises 1,500% Drug Price Cuts: Reality Bites (Like a $5,000 Pill)

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Folks, get ready for another round of Trump Derangement Syndrome from CNN! Our great President Trump, in his infinite wisdom,…

Vance “Accidentally” Reminds Democrats About Epstein, Demanding Transparency (Or Something)
Elephant Reads CNN

Vance “Accidentally” Reminds Democrats About Epstein, Demanding Transparency (Or Something)

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Here we go again, folks! The Left is suddenly “concerned” about the Epstein files now that President Trump is draining…

Rock Throws Tantrum, Turns Out It’s Older Than Your Grandma
Elephant Reads CNN

Rock Throws Tantrum, Turns Out It’s Older Than Your Grandma

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Another space rock crashes in America! This time it’s a 4.56 billion-year-old meteorite, probably sent by those Mars-loving liberals to…

New Yorker Goes From “Yonkers” to “You’re Gone-ers” at Bunny Show
Elephant Reads CNN

New Yorker Goes From “Yonkers” to “You’re Gone-ers” at Bunny Show

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Another tourist bites the dust in Puerto Rico, and guess what? It involves a Bad Bunny concert! Surprise, surprise, it…

Colorado Prison Gets Wildfire-Induced Vacay, Courtesy of Mother Nature’s Arsonist Skills | CNN
Elephant Reads CNN

Colorado Prison Gets Wildfire-Induced Vacay, Courtesy of Mother Nature’s Arsonist Skills | CNN

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Another day, another crisis courtesy of the Liberal Loons and their eco-agenda! A Colorado prison evacuated because of a wildfire?…

Trump’s National Guard Antics: Now Featuring a California Courtroom!
Elephant Reads CNN

Trump’s National Guard Antics: Now Featuring a California Courtroom!

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

Oh, the drama never ends! California’s crybaby governor, Gavin Newsom, is suing our beloved President Trump, claiming he violated some…

CNN’s “Analysis”: Orange Man Good, But Maybe Bad? A Rollercoaster of Confusion!
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN’s “Analysis”: Orange Man Good, But Maybe Bad? A Rollercoaster of Confusion!

Big ElephantAugust 11, 2025August 11, 2025

You wouldn’t BELIEVE what the liberal fake news is trying to peddle now! Apparently, President Trump’s “unchallenged personal power plays”…

CNN10: Woman Ruins Sports for Everyone (Again)
Elephant Reads CNN

CNN10: Woman Ruins Sports for Everyone (Again)

Big ElephantAugust 10, 2025August 10, 2025

Fake News CNN wants you to believe Trump is meeting Putin to end the Ukraine war? Wake up, sheeple! It’s…

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Finn October 8, 2024
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Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
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