Skip to content
https://jackal.today/

Jackal.Today satirical news site

Jackal.Today satirical news site

  • Home
  • Breaking
    • Live
    • Sport News
  • Spin the fake!
  • Elephant Reads CNN
  • The Orange Oracle
  • Videos
  • Movie News
  • Music News
    • Phil Anselmo Daily Grimaces
  • Games News
  • Jackal Research Division
  • Editorial
    • Advertise with us!
    • About Satirical Fake News Site Jackal.Today
    • Agreements and Personal data
    • Terms and Conditions
    • Opt-out preferences
    • Contact the editorial team
    • Authors

Tag: Musical

AVENGED SEVENFOLD drops new EP because you clearly didnt have enough mediocre metal in your life
Breaking, Music News

AVENGED SEVENFOLD drops new EP because you clearly didnt have enough mediocre metal in your life

Chord F. DiscordJuly 24, 2026July 24, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some unexpected news? 😱 AVENGED SEVENFOLD just surprise dropped a new EP called…

Volkswagen Profits Take Mysterious 10% Detour Straight Downward
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Volkswagen Profits Take Mysterious 10% Detour Straight Downward

Big ElephantJuly 24, 2026

Folks, I’m sipping my coffee and reading about Volkswagen’s latest struggles, and let me tell you, it’s a wild ride.…

Oh Joy Another Overpriced Blu-ray Release of a Show Nobody Watches Dan Da Dan Season 2 Because You Clearly Have Too Much Money
Breaking, Movie News

Oh Joy Another Overpriced Blu-ray Release of a Show Nobody Watches Dan Da Dan Season 2 Because You Clearly Have Too Much Money

FinnJuly 21, 2026July 21, 2026

Okay, folks, gather ’round and try to contain your excitement, because we’re about to dive into the most epic, most…

GIRLSCHOOL still exists somehow releasing new album in 2028
Breaking, Music News

GIRLSCHOOL still exists somehow releasing new album in 2028

Chord F. DiscordJuly 21, 2026July 21, 2026

Oh boy, are you guys ready for some seriously old-school metal news? 🤯 I mean, I’m not saying Girlschool is…

Melissa Auf Der Maur blesses us with more music we didnt ask for
Breaking, Music News

Melissa Auf Der Maur blesses us with more music we didnt ask for

Chord F. DiscordJuly 20, 2026July 20, 2026

Oh boy, get ready for a blast from the past! 🎸 Melissa Auf Der Maur, the iconic bassist of HOLE…

Rush To Play Same 12 Songs For 12 Months In Vegas Because You Clearly Needed That
Breaking, Music News

Rush To Play Same 12 Songs For 12 Months In Vegas Because You Clearly Needed That

Chord F. DiscordJuly 20, 2026July 20, 2026

Oh great, because what the world really needed was another reason for boomers to flock to Las Vegas: RUSH is…

Riot Grrrl Pioneer Jennifer Finch Loses Brave Fight Against Brain Cancer Because Thats How It Always Goes
Breaking, Music News

Riot Grrrl Pioneer Jennifer Finch Loses Brave Fight Against Brain Cancer Because Thats How It Always Goes

Chord F. DiscordJuly 19, 2026July 19, 2026

Oh no, the music world is literally ending: L7 bassist Jennifer Finch has passed away at 59 🤯. I mean,…

Bethesda Unveils Bloated Roadmap Featuring Fallout 5 and a Side of Corporate Hubris
Breaking, Games News

Bethesda Unveils Bloated Roadmap Featuring Fallout 5 and a Side of Corporate Hubris

Pixel P. SnarkbyteJuly 17, 2026July 17, 2026

Just when you thought the gaming world couldn’t get any more absurd, Bethesda Game Studios drops a bombshell update on…

FEAR FACTORY Finally Replaces Dino With Some Guy Named Milo
Breaking, Music News

FEAR FACTORY Finally Replaces Dino With Some Guy Named Milo

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

Breaking News: FEAR FACTORY Announces New Album and Tour, Because You Clearly Didn’t Have Enough of Their Soul-Crushing Riffs in…

Oh joy another milestone rehash for Talk Talk’s The Colour Of Spring
Breaking, Music News

Oh joy another milestone rehash for Talk Talk’s The Colour Of Spring

Chord F. DiscordJuly 16, 2026July 16, 2026

Because apparently retirement is just a suggestion, and the music industry is still churning out reissues like they’re going out…

Posts pagination

Previous 1 … 4 5 6 … 51 Next

Latest posts

  • Sports teams for sale to billionaires only apparently
  • US Army Helicopters Falling From Sky At Record Pace Somehow Still On Budget
  • US Scores Big Win Against Boat Possibly Carrying Drugs
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Trump restores energy independence and affordability despite blue state sabotage
  • ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE Iran Parliament Speaker admits severe hunger crisis nationwide

Editorial
Ads cut
Advertise with us

Introducing Jackal.Today: The Advertising Empire You’ve Always Dreamed Of!

Finn October 8, 2024
Editorial
Editorial 2026 main
Breaking, Editorial

Jackal Today’s New Year Message: We Hope 2026 Finally Stops Plagiarizing Our Satire as Breaking News

Finn December 31, 2025
August 2026
S M T W T F S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    
Copyright © 2026 Jackal.Today satirical news site | Spotlight News by Ascendoor | Powered by WordPress.