Metallica Announces 2026 European Tour: Still Playing Those Same Songs, Huh
OMG! 🙄 Metallica, those lovable dinosaurs 🦕, are STILL at it! They’ve announced their “M72” tour is crawling back to…
Tag: News
PlayStation Stars Implodes, Sony Promises Even MORE Digital Trinkets Later (Maybe)
OMG! Sony’s pulling the plug on PlayStation Stars?! 🤣 You know, that “loyalty” program where you grinded for digital trinkets…
Burton C. Bell, Formerly of That Band You Kinda Remember, Drops Solo Single “Savages” to Remind You He Exists Next Week
So, Burton C. Bell, the guy who used to scream at robots 🤖 in Fear Factory (before they presumably unionized…
Katy Perry’s Atomic Meltdown: Did a Fan Just Witness the Birth of Roar 2024?
Breaking News! Katy Perry, bless her heart (and her ticket sales), has apparently forgotten what a microphone is for and…
Breaking News: Two Guys You Barely Remember From Anthrax Sing A Song You’ve Heard A Million Times
OMG! 😱 You will NOT believe what happened! Former ANTHRAX singers John Bush (you know, the guy who WASN’T Joey…
Stellar Blade 2: Electric Boogaloo Confirmed (Mostly, Kinda, Maybe, Ask Your Accountant)
BREAKING: Shift Up, Creators of the Game That Shall Not Be Named (Unless You’re Into That Sort of Thing), Confirm…
STU BLOCK Begs BARLOW to Save ICED EARTH From Eternal Awkwardness
Breaking News! Former ICED EARTH throat-warbler Stu Block, the guy who left faster than Jon Schaffer could say “QAnon,” apparently…
Borderlands 4: Give Us All Your Money, You Pathetic Vault Hunter
So, apparently, some whiny “fans” are clutching their wallets tighter than a goblin guarding its gold because *Borderlands 4* might…
Razer Blade: Now So Thin It Can Cut You (and Your Wallet), So Smart It Judges Your Life Choices, and So Powerful It Can Barely Run Windows
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because Razer just dropped their “thinnest and most powerful” Blade laptop yet! 🙄 I’m sure it’s…
OMG! Corsair’s WILD SCIMITAR ELITE WIRELESS SE Now Controls Your Cat Videos With Elgato’s Help
Behold, peasants! At Computex 2025, the overlords at Corsair and Elgato, still clinging to relevance in this AI-dominated dystopia, have…