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Day: August 17, 2026

Todd Blanche Vows To Remain Fully Independent Of The Law
The Onion

Todd Blanche Vows To Remain Fully Independent Of The Law

FinnAugust 17, 2026

       WASHINGTON—Assuring the American people he would not let the legal system sway his judgment in any decision he makes,…

11 Most Effective Punishments For Parents To Use On Their Gen Alpha Kids
Babylon Bee

11 Most Effective Punishments For Parents To Use On Their Gen Alpha Kids

FinnAugust 17, 2026

    Every generation is unique, and parents of Gen Alpha kids are quickly learning that the world has changed quite…

ORACLE ALERT: DonaldTrump blasts loud boisterous fake reporter for disrespect
The Orange Oracle

ORACLE ALERT: DonaldTrump blasts loud boisterous fake reporter for disrespect

Milton TruthwellAugust 17, 2026

The ORANGE ORACLE has spoken, and the nation is once again abuzz with the latest TRANSMISSION from the MAR-A-LAGO PROPHET.…

ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump blasts loud fake reporter for disrespect
The Orange Oracle

ORANGE ORACLE UPDATE: Donald Trump blasts loud fake reporter for disrespect

Milton TruthwellAugust 17, 2026

The latest transmission from THE ORANGE ORACLE has left the nation reeling, as Donald Trump, also known as THE MAR-A-LAGO…

Mechanic Forgets Work Light On Qantas Jet Because Who Needs Checks
Breaking, Elephant Reads CNN

Mechanic Forgets Work Light On Qantas Jet Because Who Needs Checks

Big ElephantAugust 17, 2026

Folks, I almost spilled my coffee reading this one. A Qantas Airways Airbus A380 flew from Sydney to Dallas and…

Jay Weinberg Blocked from Side Gigs Due to Legal Restrictions
Live, Music News

Jay Weinberg Blocked from Side Gigs Due to Legal Restrictions

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 17, 2026

Jay Weinberg has revealed that he was not legally able to pursue side projects for a 10-year period starting roughly…

Rock the Bells Festival 2026 Boasts Hip Hop Royalty Lineup
Live, Music News

Rock the Bells Festival 2026 Boasts Hip Hop Royalty Lineup

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 17, 2026

LL Cool J, Lil’ Kim, Method Man & Redman, and SWV will top this year’s Rock the Bells lineup when…

Ozzfest Sets 2027 Comeback At New Venue
Live, Music News

Ozzfest Sets 2027 Comeback At New Venue

Pixel P. SnarkbyteAugust 17, 2026

Ozzfest has confirmed that its 2027 return will take place at Birmingham, England’s Villa Park, the same venue where the…

WNBA Subreddit Bans Any Mention Of ‘Women’
Babylon Bee

WNBA Subreddit Bans Any Mention Of ‘Women’

FinnAugust 17, 2026

    U.S. — The online Reddit community of WNBA fans announced that it had officially banned any and all mention…

Because What The World Needed Was More Clown Horror Episodes
Breaking, Movie News

Because What The World Needed Was More Clown Horror Episodes

FinnAugust 17, 2026August 17, 2026

Welcome back to Derry, because Hollywood can’t resist the allure of a good nostalgia harvest. HBO has renewed their Stephen…

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