U.S. Reaches Trade Deal With Pedotopia
WASHINGTON—In a major new agreement expected to provide the United States with unprecedented market access to the island nation,…
Author: Finn
Finn McFrame, celebrated satirical mastermind and self-proclaimed "Emperor of Irony," started his illustrious career as a cinematographer, where his expertise in capturing every single frame of a squirrel stealing a baguette earned him accolades at obscure film festivals.
Born in the glamorous town of Boring, Oregon, Finn grew up with dreams of being a Hollywood director until he realized that satire, not cinema, was his true calling—or at least the one that let him sleep until noon.
Finn McFrame: changing the world, one satirical lens flare at a time.
Rory McIlroy Struggling To Fit Big Check Into Mobile Deposit Photo
The post Rory McIlroy Struggling To Fit Big Check Into Mobile Deposit Photo appeared first on The Onion. The…
CBS Announces Retirement Of Longtime Masters Commentators Captain Cooter And The Gooch
AUGUSTA, GA—Saluting the illustrious sportscasters for their passionate work over the course of nearly 40 years in the Augusta…
Swalwell Insists He Didn’t Assault Any Of Those Chinese Spies He Slept With
SACRAMENTO, CA — After being accused of multiple counts of sexual assault, Representative Eric Swalwell issued a fierce denial…
Nation’s Sensitive Kids Denounce NHL Goal Horn
The post Nation’s Sensitive Kids Denounce NHL Goal Horn appeared first on The Onion. The post Nation’s Sensitive Kids…
Failed ‘Power Rangers’ Reboot Was Going to be a Super Long and Painful Four Movie Trainwreck That Luckily Got Canceled
The whopping failure of the 2017 Power Rangers reboot is still a sore spot for some fans, but let’s be…
Scottie Scheffler’s Masters Hopes Fade After Being Swallowed By Sandworm
The post Scottie Scheffler’s Masters Hopes Fade After Being Swallowed By Sandworm appeared first on The Onion. The post…
Cocaine, Caffeine Detected In Sharks
A new study revealed that sharks in the Bahamas tested positive for cocaine, caffeine, painkillers, and other substances, with…
Lucky Hockey Fan Catches Foul Tooth
ANAHEIM, CA — During Thursday night’s hockey game between the San Jose Sharks and Anaheim Ducks, one lucky fan…
Steven Spielberg Got Scared of All the Math and Science Stuff in Interstellar and Ran Away with His Tail Between His Legs
So, you want to know about Steven Spielberg and his failed attempt to direct Interstellar? 🚀👽 Well, buckle up, folks,…