Pete Hegseth Faces Difficult Confirmation Hearing
Read MoreThe OnionPresident-elect Donald Trump’s controversial nominee for defense secretary, Pete Hegseth, appeared for questioning on Capitol Hill in a…
Blog
Innovative New Bible Concordance Gives You Out-Of-Context Verses To Justify Any Behavior
GRAND RAPIDS, MI — Zondervan Publishing announced today that it would be introducing a new Bible concordance that gives readers…
To Avoid Prosecution In Britain, Neil Gaiman Joins Islamic Grooming Gang
LONDON — Authorities in the United Kingdom were outwitted once again this week, as to avoid prosecution on charges of…
Special Counsel Jack Smith Resigns
Read MoreThe OnionU.S. Special Counsel Jack Smith, who led the federal cases against Donald Trump on charges of trying to…
As White House Gig Wraps Up, Karine Jean-Pierre Prepares To Head Back To Old Job At Men’s Wearhouse
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre will be exiting politics for good at the end of Biden’s presidential term,…
Last 100 Million Mexican Citizens Hurriedly Enter U.S. During Biden’s Final Week In Office
U.S. — A final group of 100 million Mexican citizens are taking advantage of Biden’s last week in office by…
Democrats Question Pete Hegseth’s Qualifications After Learning He’s Never Once Worn A Dress
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrat members of the Armed Services Committee questioned nominee Pete Hegseth’s qualifications to serve as Secretary of…
Target Losing Market Share As More Americans Opt To Forgo All Earthly Possessions
Read MoreThe OnionMINNEAPOLIS—After months of declining sales at the retail chain, experts confirmed Tuesday that Target was losing market share…
🎬 Netflix Shocks Fans: Two Identical Versions of «The Old Guard 2» – Twice the Fun or Confusion?
Netflix has once again outdone itself in redefining absurdity, as the streaming giant announced it will release «The Old Guard…
Miracle: Worship Leader Plays Hymn As It Was Written
TULSA, OK — Congregants at a local church were witnesses to what many people described as a divine act as…